Family Meetings, Social Media Disasters & a Great Grandma Twist - with Cassie Horrell
What happens when a wedding planner is asked to walk Great Grandma down the aisle… only to be handed a Tupperware container?!
In this episode, Christa sits down with wedding expert Cassie Horrell to unpack the wildest wedding stories, biggest etiquette debates, and the jaw-dropping family drama that comes with saying “I do.” From setting boundaries with toxic in-laws to why open seating is a terrible idea, no topic is off-limits. Plus, they tackle unpopular wedding opinions and the ultimate white dress dilemma.
Get ready to laugh, gasp, and take notes for your own wedding day!
Episode Chapter Markers
00:00 Introduction
06:43 The Wedding Planner Who Walked Great Grandma (Sort Of)
08:53 Wearing White to a Wedding: A Hard No?
11:38 First Looks vs. Traditional Aisle Moments
14:13 Why Open Seating at a Wedding is a Nightmare
17:53 The Worst Mother-in-Law Story You’ll Ever Hear
22:38 Bridesmaid Budget Drama & Bachelorette Expectations
27:08 Unpopular Wedding Opinions: Toss Traditions or Keep Them?
31:46 Wedding Confessions: The Most Awkward Guest Bets Ever
Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
- Great Grandma’s Final Wedding Appearance – When a groom’s family insists their beloved great-grandmother must be part of the wedding, Cassie prepares for an emotional moment—until she’s handed a Tupperware container.
- Wearing White to a Wedding: A Crime? – Cassie and Christa debate the biggest wedding guest faux pas and share real-life stories of guests who should’ve known better.
- First Look vs. Traditional Aisle Moment – The pros, cons, and the real reason so many wedding planners swear by first looks.
- The Worst Mother-in-Law Ever? – This mother-in-law sabotaged dress shopping, criticized the bride’s body, and demanded her son’s ex be reinstated as a bridesmaid.
- Why Open Seating is a Disaster – Cassie explains why letting guests pick their own seats sounds nice in theory—but causes absolute chaos in reality.
- Wedding Confessions: The Awkward Guest Bets – What happens when wedding guests start betting on how long the marriage will last? Christa and Cassie react to the ultimate cringe moment.
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
“PSA: If you have to ask, ‘Is this too white for a wedding?’—the answer is YES.” – Christa Innis
“I could not imagine having to walk on eggshells around my in-laws. That’s terrifying.” – Christa Innis
“Why do people feel the need to comment on a bride’s body on her wedding day?” – Christa Innis
“Nothing is mandatory at a wedding. If a tradition doesn’t serve you, toss it.” – Cassie Horrell
“If your wedding planner asks if your guest list is finalized, don’t surprise them with last-minute ‘add-ons’ like great-grandma’s ashes.” – Cassie Horrell
“You don’t need to invite people just because they’re family. It’s your day.” – Cassie Horrell
About Cassie
Cassie Horrell is a seasoned wedding planner and event coordinator known for her ability to handle even the most unpredictable wedding day chaos with humor and grace. With years of experience in the industry, Cassie has seen it all—from heartwarming moments to jaw-dropping disasters—and she’s not afraid to spill the tea. She’s passionate about helping couples navigate the stress of wedding planning, set boundaries with overbearing family members, and create a day that feels authentically theirs. Whether it’s dodging last-minute guest list surprises or dealing with wedding etiquette debates, Cassie brings expertise, real talk, and a whole lot of laughs.
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Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Christa Innis: Hi, Cassie. Thank you so much for coming on.
Cassie Horrell: Of course. Thank you so much for having me.
Christa Innis: Yes. I’m so excited, especially because you have like firsthand experience in wedding drama. You do so much when it comes to weddings and you have some amazing content that I’ve loved, like seeing more recently. Cause when I started talking about the podcast, people kept tagging you.
And I was like, this is so cool. And you have like so many stories. So I was like, we have to talk and like, see what we can, come up with here. But before we get started, can you just tell us a little bit about you and what you do and then we’ll kind of jump into it.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah, my name is Cassie.
A lot of people on tiktok know me as wedding pro cast. I’ve been in the industry for about 12 years now. Always working venue based usually from properties like clubs, resorts. And now I work at the Heinz History Center in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. so that’s kind of my main job. I help and lead a team that does about 60 weddings a year.
So we see a ton come in and out of our building. and I own a mobile bar, Clink 92, that services weddings and all kinds of events in Pittsburgh and Ohio. And then just this year, because of TikTok, I have started taking on personal clients, very small, anywhere between two to five a year, just because I’m so busy, where I actually do full service planning and partial planning for couples, so.
Christa Innis: That is amazing. Having fun. Yeah. So you’re like a planner by nature. You love getting it all together.
Cassie Horrell: Yes. I feel like since I’ve been young, that’s how I am. And I am just a very creative person. So any type of outlet where I can be connecting with people and sharing ideas and building something from the ground up, I absolutely love.
Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s amazing. And 60 weddings a year. Wow. That is, how do you keep everything like straight? Like, do you ever like mix up like, Oh, this couple here, wait, that was that couple. Like, I don’t, how do you, you have to be a really like very organized person.
Cassie Horrell: So I have to say, like, a lot of the reason we’re so successful is because of the amazing people that work on my team. I oversee several planners, events operations managers, and a full crew that really help the magic kind of come together on a wedding day. So that helps me not have to take on the brunt of everything, which helps a lot. I usually just at the History Center have anywhere between 8 to 12 couples that are specifically mine. Um, So that makes it a little bit easier to manage.
Christa Innis: Yeah, yeah, definitely. Wow, that sounds awesome. So I bet like, which we’re going to talk about today, I bet you have a lot of wedding horror stories. I’m sure you have good and bad stories. Yes. we always talk about, I always make sure, and I’m sure you have to say this with your People on your channel as well as like there are so many amazing wedding stories. I get some comments Sometimes it’ll be like, oh, thank god Like I saw this because I never want to get married and i’m just like no I don’t want my channel to like make you not want to get married or have a wedding because there’s like so many drama free Weddings, but the drama ones just really heighten when they’re so crazy,
Cassie Horrell: right?
And I feel like i’m the same way I go on my channel like every so Often, and I’m like, hey, just a reminder. A lot of the stories are dramatized and bad things do not happen at every wedding. Every single wedding has the happy moments. It has these beautiful moments, and none of the stories I tell, I never want them to veer somebody from getting married. Like, obviously, I’m in the wedding industry, as you are. Like, we love weddings. we like to see the big weddings. And I see a lot of people like, I’m eloping because of this. And I’m like, please don’t jump to that conclusion. These stories just like, I feel like our audience thrives on them and it gives them a little bit of drama in their day. So that’s why it’s fun to post and connect with people.
Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. And I think the other side of it too is like, teaching people like, boundaries to have. Like, some of the conversations that you post is like, it’s helping someone on whether they’re like, quote unquote villain of the story or quote unquote like, protagonist.
Like, seeing these like, conversations take place can help. I’m know what to say in certain situations or how to set boundaries with someone that maybe is overbearing.
Cassie Horrell: Exactly. And I get a lot of people, I know your channel does too, where people will say, oh my gosh, I’m the mom in this situation. Or I need to say this to my mom, I need to say this to my sister, because it puts into perspective that other people are going through a similar situation or something that’s pretty applicable.
And how we are responding shows them how they could respond.
Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. So jumping into kind of crazy stories and wedding hot takes, what is like one of the craziest stories that comes to mind when you’re asked about it?
The Wedding Planner Who Walked Great Grandma… Or Did She?
Cassie Horrell: so this one, it’s one of the funnier ones, but it’s a little bit heartfelt.
And I have shared it on my page two different times. but I had a couple that was just, Like elite vibes, you know when you like bond with a couple everybody in the family is like so fun There was zero drama. So I go into the wedding weekend and we run rehearsal. Everything’s great The next day I check in on the couples we had where I was working at the time. There was like two Villas so one for the ladies one for the gentleman check it with the ladies. Everything’s good I check in with the gentleman and they all the sudden are like, oh my gosh We forgot to tell you our great grandma Has to be in the wedding ceremony and I’m like, oh my goodness, like, I can’t believe we didn’t go over this.
So I logistically go into planner mode, like, what song does she want to walk to? Does she need an escort? Is there a walker or a wheelchair? Where are we reserving her a spot? And they’re like, yeah, we’d love if you would walk her down the aisle and as long as she has a seat in the front row, that’s all good. So me, I’m like, great. Just let me know when grandma gets here and I’m looking around like no grandma in sight. And one of the groomsmen, who was the brother, is like, Hey, Grandma’s already here. I already have her. And I’m like, Oh, well, do you need me to go get a wheelchair to, like, pick her up? And he’s like, No, let me go grab her.
And brings out a Tupperware container of her remains. And, like, they have, they have drawn, like, this little smiley face on it. And me, like, I was just surprised, like, whatever, if that’s what your family does, and like, this is how you bring great grandma to things. And they just hand her over to me, like, yeah, here she is, like, if you don’t mind, like, before it starts, walking her down and, like, putting her on the chair so her face is facing us. And I’m like, her face? A joke? So, I literally have this little Tupperware container that I’m, like, walking down before the real processional starts. I place her on the chair, like, make sure the little Sharpie face that they drew on there is, like, facing front. And to me, I found it, like, hilarious, but also, like, a little sentimental and special, like, this is how their family’s, like, including their great grandma, and they told me after that their great grandma has been to, like, all the cousins weddings, she comes to the holidays, and it’s, like, kind of a joke, but also not, and to me, that was, like, One of those crazy stories that you like go into a wedding day and you don’t Expect for that to happen and you just kind of got to go with it and keep everything light hearted So yeah, that’s one that I share quite frequently because it’s not too drama filled but just a little surprising.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Oh my gosh Because it’s like one of those things where I think They probably got so used to in their own family, just saying, Oh, great grandma, bring great grandma, but forgot to mention to you, like, great grandma’s ashes. Like, you know, so you’re expecting this, like, person and they just were like, let’s see what she, how she reacts to that.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah. And like, luckily I’m very, like, go with the flow. So I was just like, okay, great grandma’s going to hang out with me for the next hour. I’ll make sure she gets down the aisle.
Christa Innis: Oh, my gosh. Okay. So kind of going into that, but I want to talk about wedding hot takes and I kind of want to angle it a little bit differently since you’re so involved in the wedding industry.
Cassie Horrell: Okay.
Christa Innis: This first one’s about a guest or someone wearing white to the wedding. How would you handle that? And like, what are your own takes on when someone tries to wear white to a wedding?
Wearing White to a Wedding: Just Don’t
Cassie Horrell: Okay. My own personal take is absolutely not. We are not wearing white to a wedding. Only reason you should be wearing white to a wedding is if the couple, like, specifies, hey, the dress code is all white. Because there are weddings that do that. And I think in that case, of course. But if it has not been specified to wear white, it is reserved for the bride, typically. I have had brides get married in blue. I’ve had brides get married in black, but typically, if you’re going to take a bet on something, most likely the bride is wearing a shade of white.
So, personally, that is my take. I have only had this happen twice, where I’ve had people arrive to a wedding and they are wearing white. one time it was a child that was like a guest, maybe like middle aged school age. So I didn’t really think that was an issue. It didn’t become an issue. But there was another time where a girl was literally wearing a white dress. It had like very teeny weenie tints of like blush flowers, like very light, looked white. And in this case, I basically went to one of the bridesmaids. And I said, how do you think the bride is going to react to her wearing white?
And the bridesmaid was like, she needs to change. So I approached the guest, and I’ve actually done a, I did a story on this on my page. Approached the guest and I just let her know, Somebody in the wedding party has noticed the white dress. Do you have any change of clothes? Are you coming from out of town? Luckily, she was like, I thought people might think this was too white. Which I’m like, did you look in the mirror? She was staying at the hotel that was like a mile away. She had arrived at least 20 minutes before the ceremony. So she’s like, I will go back now. I’ll change. She actually ended up not making it back for the ceremony.
And she was there at cocktail hour in a purple dress. So to me, if. Someone wears white and I’m not sure how the couple would respond. Maybe we haven’t chatted about it. I will approach somebody that’s close to the bride. mom, sister, I typically don’t like to bother the bride with it. and if they think they need to change, I have no problem. Approaching somebody letting them know.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Oh my gosh. That was handled so well, because it’s like, you never know how that person’s gonna react either. but yeah, like, PSA is like, if you think it’s too white, or when you’re looking in the mirror getting ready, and you’re like, mm, no people think it, then it probably is too white.
Cassie Horrell: Yes. If it crosses your mind, is this too white, or you’re texting a group chat, do we think this is too, has too much white in it, then like, just put it back on, in your closet and wear it another day.
Christa Innis: Yeah, yeah. Oh, my gosh. Okay. What are your thoughts on the bride and groom seeing each other before walking down the ceremony, like doing a first look as opposed to at the end of the altar?
First Look vs. Aisle Moment: The Ultimate Wedding Debate
Cassie Horrell: So, as a professional, I’m a huge fan of the first look. Just logistically, it makes your couple’s day, I think, a little bit more relaxed, not as rushed. obviously, you can get all those pictures before. And if I know my couples are super emotional, I sometimes recommend that because it takes the pressure off of, like, having that moment when you walk down the aisle.
So, personally, as a or as a professional, I would 100 percent say first look. Now, personally, I am a sucker for, like, the traditional, see each other when you walk down the aisle. That is what I did with my husband, but I do have to say we were both like happy crying the whole wedding because it was so overwhelming. And that is one of the reasons that I’m like, man, if I went back in time, I might have done a first look.
Christa Innis: but
Cassie Horrell: that was like eight years ago. So I’m like, first looks were not as popular then.
Christa Innis: Right, right. That’s so funny. That’s like such a, that’s like the very common thing I hear. It’s like, Logistically, when people are like planners or they work behind the scenes, they’re like, yes, do a first look.
But for brides themselves, a lot of times they’re like, no, I love that, like, moment because I was the same way. Like, I loved having that first moment down the aisle. But I’ve been a part of so many weddings where they did a first look, so. It’s kind of interesting to see, um, do you have any wedding hot takes or unpopular opinions that you can think of far off the bat?
Otherwise, we’ll jump into a section called unpopular opinions from other people.
Why Open Seating at a Formal Wedding is a Nightmare
Cassie Horrell: Okay, well, one opinion that I always share very frequently on my page and it always is like I get so many like comments is I do not believe a formal wedding. has, should have open seating. Like, absolutely not. It should be organized seating.
I don’t care if you’re doing seating assignments or table assignments. Open seating at a formal wedding is just not it. And I always talk about like the repercussions of choosing that and people in the comments are like Oh, I did open seating for my 300 person wedding. It was no problem. And I was like, you probably just didn’t see it cause it was your wedding day. But when I tell you there’s repercussions to that choice, there totally is. So that is like my number one opinion that I have on seating.
Christa Innis: Yes. No, I love that. I, I’m such a planner myself, type a, I love a good seating chart. Like nothing makes me happier than being as a guest and on the other side of things.
I love being told where to sat, where to sit because, It kind of brings back like, Oh, we have enough room or, Oh, I don’t know anybody at this wedding. So where are my husband and I, or where am I going to squeeze in and it’s just makes things less awkward if you’re like, you know what, that’s my seat. Don’t need to think about it.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah, literally from like a timeline standpoint. Guest comfortability and then even the host comfortability, knowing everybody will be taken care of. It’s the best route to go.
Christa Innis: Yes. And I loved, I don’t know about you at your own wedding, but I loved putting together the seating chart of like, Oh, this person would get along with that person, but I’m going to put them here.
And like, my husband would laugh at me because I had so much fun. Like every night I’d be like, okay, I think I need to move these people. He’s like, it looks good. I’m like, well, how about this and this? And like, I loved like. The final, like, I don’t know. It was so much fun for me to put together.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah. Me and my husband got married.
We were 23, 24. So like pretty young. So I felt a little bit like matchmaker. Cause like we were invited a lot of our single friends after college. Oh, we could sit these people together and these people together. Uh, but no, that’s definitely a fun part of it.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. I love that. Okay. So here’s some unpopular opinions that people sent me on Instagram.
So let’s kind of see what they had to say. Um, this person says. Take. Okay. Take wedding parties, individual budget into consideration when planning wedding events. What are your thoughts on that?
Cassie Horrell: Make wedding parties, individual budgets. Okay. So when I, if you’re in the wedding party, I am on board. I do have to agree.
I am on board with like getting a general sense of like where people are at monetarily. Usually in a wedding party, like people are all over in their life. Like some people may have kids. Some people may be in eight weddings that year. So I do think it’s important to kind of get a general sense of what people can spend when it comes to like bachelorette.
And those types of things. I think when it comes to the actual wedding, no, um, that should be up to the couple. Um, when it comes to attire, you 100 percent should keep in mind people’s budget, especially if they’re buying all of their own things. If the bride or groom are paying for wedding party things, then I don’t think it truly matters.
Um, but yeah, I am on board on that for the most part.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And I think too, an important thing to say is like, It should never be a requirement. Like, if someone wants to be in your wedding, like, but they’re like, I can’t make it to the bachelorette party, it’s out of my budget, it’s okay to say no to those things.
Because I see so many times in comments like, oh, the bride’s selfish for wanting to do a bachelorette party trip to Florida or wherever it is. And it’s like, but as a bridesmaid, you have the free will to say No, like, I will be in your wedding, but I can’t afford this. Um, so it definitely goes both ways for sure.
Yes. Um, this person says, Her unpopular opinion is doing something for tradition’s sake is unnecessary, i. e. the bouquet toss and garter toss.
Cassie Horrell: I agree with that one as well. Um, I feel regardless of the tradition, the couple should always be choosing things that make the most sense for them and their partner and, like, are going to enhance their day.
And if you are getting forced to do a cake cutting, the guard, or the bouquet, and you don’t want to do it, like, it’s the worst thing. Like, nobody should be forcing you to do anything on your day just because it’s tradition or mom did it, dad did it. Um, and I always tell people that there is no Nothing is mandatory at a wedding when it comes to the formalities.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I feel like so many times people fall into the trap of like, well, they did it so I have to do it too. Or this is like what’s expected of me. And I feel like when you start going that way, then you either have regrets about your wedding or you’re uncomfortable on your own wedding day.
Right? Yeah, I totally agree. Okay, I want to jump into this week’s wedding submission because it’s a little. A little long. Um, so here we go. I’ve not read this, so we’ll see how this, how this one goes. Um, and feel free to stop me anytime if you want to add something or react to it. We’ll just kind of react as it goes.
The Monster-in-Law Who Tried to Take Over the Wedding
Cassie Horrell: Let me pull up on my screen here and make sure I can see it all. Okay. When my husband and I met online, or sorry, when my husband and I met, it was online. I knew before I ever met him, it was. He, in person, he was the man I was going to marry. We talked for a long time via messages and FaceTime before ever meeting.
We met and it wasn’t long before he had hinted that he was going to propose to me. It finally happened a week before one of my closest friends was to be married. So I kept the news to myself until we got through that and then I announced it, which props to her. That’s very nice.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Um, my, my parents had already knew it was going to happen.
As he sat down and spoke with them, my older brother also knew it was coming as well. I guess he had covered all the bases with my family about asking me to marry him, but he hadn’t said anything to his family at all. Which What? Interesting. Excuse me? Yeah. When we announced that we were engaged on Facebook, oh gosh, everyone seemed very happy about it.
Then I started to see angry faces and a lot of negative comments. My mother in law commented saying, how effing, the actual word, effing dare you announce this without asking my permission first? Oh, not on a public face.
Cassie Horrell: This is terrible.
Christa Innis: So bad. Uh, then it only got worse from there. She proceeded to call me names and tell me that I wasn’t good enough to marry her son.
Oh my gosh. Uh, all while she was commenting, my sister in law was commenting and yelling, Oh, calling and yelling at him about how they should have had a family meeting about allowing a woman with kids into the family.
Cassie Horrell: What?
Christa Innis: I felt sick and unwanted. That is terrible. Family meeting.
Cassie Horrell: No.
Christa Innis: Oh, my gosh.
Eventually we get to planning the wedding and his mom had made it very clear that she did not want any part of helping plan the wedding. We tried to include her many times, but she would just keep saying rude things about how my wedding didn’t need to be the center of every conversation. So my husband is from a really small town and we went there for the Fourth of July.
This was the first time I would be meeting his dad and step mom, his brother and sister. Yes, the same sister that was calling and yelling at him. It was a good time, and they were very interested in all the things that we had planned for the wedding. Okay, so it seems like some family member was like,
Cassie Horrell: this is turning around.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cassie Horrell: Maybe.
Christa Innis: Maybe. His dad told us that we had an allotted amount of money to use, and that if he needed anything beyond that, um, his mom would have to help us. So his ex, the dad’s ex wife. Um, so it was the day we went dress shopping and because we had so many bridesmaids, the place was a full house.
Everyone was having the best time. Then we felt a shift in the energy and my mother in law walked in just the gray clouds.
Cassie Horrell: Here we go.
Christa Innis: She was extremely upset that no one picked her. Picked her up to bring her to the bridal shop. She sat down and shouted, Let’s get this thing over with. I don’t want to be here all effing day.
Cassie Horrell: She seems nasty.
Christa Innis: Yeah, why even invite her? Like, I would be like, No, you’re not coming. Cause I wouldn’t even want someone’s opinions like that. My mom looked over at her and asked her to leave then if she didn’t want to be there. Yeah. Then she said, She’s been married before, so I don’t know why she even needs to buy a dress.
Cassie Horrell: That is terrible.
Christa Innis: I hate that. She could have gotten one at Goodwill.
Cassie Horrell: No.
Christa Innis: Okay, that is terrible.
Cassie Horrell: This lady’s a witch.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I ignored the comments and started trying on dresses. There wasn’t a dress I tried on that she didn’t have a rude comment about. I would be telling her to leave at that point. That is, yeah, that’s so like unenjoyable.
I finally found the one and loved it and it made me happy. Later that evening at dinner, she tells my husband. I found the dress that hides my arm flab the best.
Cassie Horrell: No, this is bad. I don’t know who this woman is, but this is bad.
Christa Innis: This is bad. This is like one of the worst stories I’ve read. Oh my gosh. The night of my rehearsal, my mother in law sat there complaining the whole time how she had to sit at the same table as my father in law.
She kept saying he better not talk to me. Then finally my brother in law shows up late and my mother in law demanded that I allow my brother in law’s wife in the wedding as a bridesmaid.
Cassie Horrell: Excuse me?
Christa Innis: At the rehearsal dinner? Okay. She was supposed to be my bridesmaid and then they broke up and I guess they got back together the week of the wedding.
Surprise. Okay. They called me many times that week and never said anything about it so I was a little taken aback by this. My mother in law told me that she was told to bring the dress and that she would make me let her be in the wedding again.
Cassie Horrell: This is the mother in law said that again said that the
Christa Innis: oh told me to bring her dress with and she and to make her bring.
Okay. Wait, I need to say that again. Sorry.
Cassie Horrell: I’m like, wait,
Christa Innis: my mother in law told me that she told her to bring the dress with her and that she would make me let her be in the wedding again.
Cassie Horrell: Okay. So force this girl into the wedding.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And make her and make my other bridesmaids sit out. Wait, so that’s even worse. Like, we’re just going to swap you right in there.
Cassie Horrell: This is terrible.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. I told her I wouldn’t allow my other bridesmaid who paid money for the dress to sit out and they would both have to walk down the aisle together. That didn’t make her happy and she told me to just tell my bridesmaid that we would reimburse her for the dress and she could sit down and enjoy herself. I again told her absolutely not. She got upset and called me a spoiled witch. I
Cassie Horrell: I’m a little taken back by this woman.
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s hard because it’s like I’m not in that position, so it’s always different when you’re in it, but I’m just like, I could not stand to be around someone like that that’s constantly mean like that and just like trying to control everything.
Cassie Horrell: Also, I’m a little confused. Like, why isn’t the partner standing up to his mom or like being a little bit more supportive here? Because it wasn’t like one instance. This is like 20 instances.
Christa Innis: Yes. Like he needs to be like. Like, guarded security at this point, like, blocking her, because yeah, that’s, that’s too much.
We finally get to the rehearsal, we finally get the rehearsal done and everyone left to go to my brother’s house where we were gonna have pizza. My sister in law made rude comments about how we could only afford pizza and not a real meal.
Cassie Horrell: Oh
Christa Innis: no. Let me tell you, we had pizza at our rehearsal dinner and it was still expensive.
Everyone loves pizza. There’s no problem with pizza. Exactly. No one complained. At least not to our face. Um, My parents shelled out over a thousand dollars for this meal. It’s what we chose as it feeds the most. And it was easy as my husband was having his bachelor party the night before the wedding.
Cassie Horrell: Yikes. Sewing
Christa Innis: scrims, man. Yeah. No, I don’t know if people still did that. Yeah, no, no,
Cassie Horrell: no.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Um, uh, yeah, so he had his bachelor party. It was a terrible idea, by the way. But that’s a story for another day. So we all had pizza and us girls all left. We told my mother in law three times before we left what time our hair and makeup appointment was the next morning. And we were almost done when she and my brother in law’s wife showed up to get ready. She said, how dare I get ready before the mother of The groom. What? I cannot believe the audacity here.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah, she’s out of line. Yeah.
Christa Innis: When everyone was ready to go to the ballroom and get ready for pictures, she was mad that we were leaving her. Well, you should have been there on time.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah.
Christa Innis: We were on a strict time frame. We told her that my sister in law needed to be there by a certain time for pictures. She never got there in time for pictures and it snowballed from there. My mother in law ruined our first look, not surprised, by accidentally getting mud all over the bottom of my dress. Oh. Accidentally. Yeah, how did that happen? She wouldn’t smile in any pictures. Oh my gosh. Um, so later that night I heard someone say that my mother in law was telling everyone that my wedding was unclassy and tacky. And that clearly we didn’t have any money to buy real things. Why do people feel the need to make comments like that?
Cassie Horrell: Right, keep it to yourself.
Christa Innis: Yeah, like, come on. Oh, and yes, then the arm, arm flab comet came up again that night. I’d slap her. I’d slap her. Oh my gosh, that is terrible. Like, never, never comment on someone’s body, but especially not a bride on her wedding day. Exactly. Like, that is not okay. And that night she walked by and pinched my arm and said, You should really work on that. It’s gross.
Cassie Horrell: No. This could be like a whole series. This is like the series of Unfortunate Mother in Law. I don’t know what this is.
Christa Innis: Literally, I’m like picturing like, uh, I don’t even know, like, what’s that movie? Like, Monster in Law? It’s like literally something like that. Like, if someone did that to me, I would literally be like, you can leave right now. But I would’ve, I feel like I would’ve said that so many times. I don’t know. Same. Um, I wish I could have made that up, but I didn’t. My mother in law to this day is still not a nice woman, doesn’t speak to me, my brother in law is not married to that woman anymore, and my father in law is still the coolest. Well, at least the father in law is cool. Here’s to 10 years and crazy in laws.
Cassie Horrell: Wow. I can’t believe she put up with that on her wedding day.
Christa Innis: I, yeah, I feel like once I saw those like rude Facebook comments, I would be like, okay, we need to fix this now or you’re not invited to anything because like the wedding dress thing, I would not want to put on and try wedding dresses in front of someone like that.
Cassie Horrell: No, I mean, I did dress shopping with just me and my mom and it was like perfect because it was like little opinion and like I could really try it on. I can’t imagine like having my whole wedding party, my mom, mother in law, especially somebody that like, You get the vibes. They don’t like you. It’s like they’re trying to sabotage your whole experience, which is what this woman did.
Christa Innis: Exactly. Yeah. And like kind of going back to when people are like, Oh, these stories make me never want to get married or something. It’s like someone like this. You have red flags ahead of time. Like you’re not going to just also have a you. Um, wedding dress shop and the person that’s been so nice to you is always going to be like, Oh, that looks terrible, you know, like, so I think a lot of times you’ll have those red flags about people. And if you don’t, I don’t think it’s going to automatically just change.
Cassie Horrell: Right. I think the thing that just like surprises me about the story is that the husband was seeing this happen and like she doesn’t share the husband might have had conversations with his mom like she didn’t share that part of it but I’m like, that truly shocks me that like he would allow.
His mom to speak to his wife like that and I’m like, I just I can’t imagine that happened Like you said like we’re not in that in the situation. You’re reading it from a one sided story But like that’s what shocks me. The most is that like they let her get away with it
Christa Innis: Right. Well, yeah, and it’s and I find it interesting She says and she doesn’t speak to me which makes me think she still speaks to the Sun which And I, again, don’t want to make assumptions, but if I was being treated that way, and my husband was still talking to his mom, I would be like, no.
Like, you need to back up your wife. Right. So, it sounds like she’s, like, still talking to The son, but just not the wife and the wife, like the brother’s like wife so much and she was like trying to pull her in. I’m like, what’s the difference? Like, wow,
Cassie Horrell: and they’re not even married anymore. So it looks like the son picked a very great partner. We’re like, the other son didn’t have as great of a match. So that’s a little weird too.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Yeah. I feel like when I hear these stories, it has to do with like some kind of like jealousy or like appearances or like, like she wants to look a certain way. I don’t know. Yeah.
Cassie Horrell: That’s it always surprises me because like I have the world’s best mother in law that she’s just like an angel and like Our families get along, and there’s just like never really issues, and in the planning process it was like so easy, so when I hear these stories, I’m like, I can’t believe someone would act like that, or like, treat somebody like that, especially in like, the era of being engaged and planning your wedding, like it’s such a sentimental time, and something that you think about like for the rest of your life, and like for somebody to ruin it, because of their poor attitude, I’m like, how unfortunate, Is that that happens to people.
Christa Innis: I know. I know. It’s so funny because when I post these stories, people always assume it’s because, I have a terrible mother in law too. And I’m like, no, my mother in law is amazing. Like, like I could call her up any time of the day. She’s so sweet. Like we get along great. Our family’s going on great. And so then when I hear these stories, I’m like, I could not imagine having to, like, feel like you have to, like, walk on tiptoes, or get super anxious when you have to go see his family or something, like, That’s terrifying.
Cassie Horrell: Yeah. And like, I’m sure you get this in your comments as well, but I am also sometimes surprised by how many people are like, I have this, like, this is the situation I’m in with in laws. And I’m like, hundreds and hundreds of people that like can relate to that. I’m like, that is shocking to me.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
And even when I dramatize things, like, and I’m like, Oh, this is like a really crazy character. I’ll do this. And someone will comment and they’re like, That’s almost word for word how my mother in law talks to me. And I’m like, girl, I’m so sorry. Yeah. Because I’m also someone like I hate confrontation. I’m so bad with stuff like that. So when I hear this stuff, I’m like, my stomach drops. I’m like, how do you deal with that? I would not be able to.
Cassie Horrell: No, no.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Well, that was a good story. Bad story, but a good, great,
Cassie Horrell: great story. A great story with a lot of drama.
Christa Innis: Yes. I’m very sorry for this, Bri, but thank you for sharing your story with us and I’m glad you, sounds like you’ve set up some boundaries. Where you don’t talk to her, but let’s get that husband on side. Yeah. Okay, so to end, I’m just gonna read a couple of confessions that people sent to me. People are sending me confessions on Instagram as well. I love
Cassie Horrell: this.
The Nine-Hour Road Trip Request: Mother-in-Law Madness
Christa Innis: And then we’ll just share, our takes on them. Okay. I was having some guests before kind of rate them as like mild tea or chaos, but it’s kind of more fun just to kind of react to them. okay. So this one says. My mother in law wanted us to travel nine and a half hours to her while I’m 36 weeks pregnant.
Cassie Horrell: No, absolutely not. I have two kids. No. Nope, nope, nope.
Christa Innis: Same. Yeah, I’d be like, no, thank you. I barely wanted to travel, like, to the store when I was 36 weeks pregnant,
Cassie Horrell: so. Yeah, and you can’t, like, you would have to drive. You can’t even get on a plane at that time. Exactly. Like, you would have to drive there, and like, how uncomfortable, and what if something happens, and you’re nine and a half hours from home, like, that’s where you have to go to have your baby. Those aren’t your doctors. Crazy. That’s crazy. Yeah.
Christa Innis: Like, you can come to me if you really want to.
Cassie Horrell: Exactly.
Christa Innis: This person says the bride and groom shouldn’t set invites to family members who they don’t have a relationship with.
Cassie Horrell: Now, I’m like, I’m pro that. Like, I kind of support that. I’m always like, and I see it from the other side, like, just because your family doesn’t entitle you to an invitation, I do.
I think that if you are curating a guest list that is like, you want to be surrounded by people that are supportive of you, involved in your life, then like, why are you sending invitations to your fourth cousins that you’ve never met?
Christa Innis: It can look
Cassie Horrell: a little bit like a money grab, but then I also see it on the other side, where I’m like, people just have big families, they’re not close with everybody.
that doesn’t mean they don’t want to come and support the couple.
Christa Innis: So.
Cassie Horrell: I see it both ways.
Christa Innis: I know. I know. It’s hard. It’s like, I feel like traditionally it was like, invite everybody that like, your parents, friends, your parents, second cousins and stuff. But now I feel like people are getting better about, okay, well, what can we fit in our budget? or do we want to be surrounded by people that we personally know? And I think it just goes down to like, as the bride and groom, what do you two want and go from there? I guess that was more of like a. Opinion, Alyssa Confession. Okay, this last one, at my oldest brother’s wedding, my cousins and I secretly bet on how long it would last.
Betting on the Marriage: Wedding Guests Gone Too Far
Cassie Horrell: I think that’s a little bit funny, but also I’m like, hopefully your cousin’s picking like a good imagine you would wish for a lifetime of happiness. But I’ve had friends in this situation where like I go to the wedding and I’m like, I don’t know if this is it for them. In the back of my mind, I don’t say it out loud, right.
It’s in the back of my mind.
Christa Innis: I know, that is a little bit of a hot take there of like going, but I mean I’m sure like it’s, you kind of think about it because you’re at a wedding and you’re like okay, here’s to like forever. I’ve definitely been to a wedding and Spoiler alert, they did get in a divorce, and I’m not friends with the girl, not because of that, but it’s a whole other thing, but at the wedding I was like, this is doomed, and I hate to say that, because never thought that other than this wedding, I was like, this is, or no, I’m sorry, there’s been two, and they both I have
Cassie Horrell: two.
And so did mine. They ended in a divorce or separation. So I’m like
Christa Innis: Well, and they both, both of them had red flags before. Like, literally, the bride was crying to us at her bachelorette party. And we were like, if you need to get out, like, tell us what you need. Like, we’ll help you. No, no, no. It’s fine. Day before the wedding, after the rehearsal dinner, sobbing in the car. I don’t want to do this. We already spent so much money.
Cassie Horrell: And that happens, like, there is people that that happens to, like, they go through with it because they feel like their parents or themselves or whoever’s contributing have already paid all of this money and it’s like, we don’t want to cancel it, like, but at the end of the day, it’s like, it’s canceling your wedding because you know, it’s not the right match better than a divorce one year later.
Christa Innis: Exactly. And that’s going to be costly too, so, just turn it into a big party. Everyone’s traveling in. Have a big party. Exactly. Exactly. I mean, I know it’s easier said than done, but right, definitely. all right. Well, that was the last one. Well, thank you so much for coming on. This was, yeah, this was a blast. can you tell everyone where they can follow you? Any other projects you’re working on and all that good stuff?
Cassie Horrell: Yes. So, you could follow me. Wedding podcasts. I am mainly on TikTok, but I’m starting to branch out. Instagram, I am getting a couple things in the works for YouTube. I do not have it in me to do a podcast, but I love being a guest on the podcast.
So this is amazing . a couple projects I’m working on. So I have created. And a lot of people find me in for this is I’ve created planning courses that are very cost effective for people that are self planning and cannot afford a wedding planner. So I have always offered these to my wedding my way and three to four months till I do, which are specific to like certain timeframes of your wedding.
I am currently working on a membership, which will be like an alternative way of planning where you basically have like a video vault and constant courses and things being uploaded. And I just wrote two children’s books that are specific to, like, Flower Girl and Ring Bear, and about the ABCs of weddings. So, I am in the phase of illustrating those, and hopefully those will come out sometime early 2025.
Christa Innis: Oh, that’s so cool! How awesome. You, like, you do it all. You’ve got a lot of projects. My brain doesn’t stop.
Cassie Horrell: It’s like I have an idea and I’m like, yeah, I’m just going to go for it. have no clue what I’m doing out here.
I’m just having fun and going with the flow.
Christa Innis: I love it. It’s that like planner mindset where you’re just like, okay, let’s just do it. Let’s get busy and find something. I love that. well, when those are available, definitely send me links and stuff and we can get it in the show notes. Well, thank you so much for coming on.
That was so fun having you react. Like I said, had some people tag you in like comments and stuff and now I follow your stuff and I like I love your content because you’re so involved in the wedding stuff that you’ve got stories for days so yeah
Cassie Horrell: but I feel like we have a very similar audience because we’re storytellers and like my whole page isn’t storytelling but Usually one a day, I try to tell stories and I get the same, like, people will be like, Did you see her story? And they’ll tag me, and I’m like, Oh, I saw it. That’s a juicy one. Yes.
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s so good. I, can’t stop watching the, drama stories. They just, those ones just get me. Like, I love it.
Cassie Horrell: I feel like they’re like, a little bit of, like, reprieve from people’s everyday life.
Like, they come and they watch our stories, and it’s like, a minute and a half of like, totally Drama that they’re not in.
Christa Innis: Yes. And they get
Cassie Horrell: their little fix for the day, and then they’re like, Okay, I’ll come back tomorrow, like, see the next part, or whatever’s going on.
Christa Innis: Yes, yeah, it’s a good little, little break from reality, I think.
Yes. Awesome. Well, thank you so much again for coming on. It was awesome chatting with you. Thank you so much.
All right, guys, that was my interview with Cassie. I love chatting with her. It’s so fun to hear from someone that is so involved in the wedding industry. She’s got a lot of hot takes and she has. Honestly seen it all. So, thank you, Cassie, for coming on. Just a reminder, guys, if you love this episode or loving this podcast, please leave a review on Apple podcast.
It really helps more people hear the podcast. And helps me create more amazing content for you. so I really appreciate all the support that this podcast has gotten so far, and I can’t wait for more people to hear it and to create some more content. If you also have suggestions of who you want to see next on the podcast, feel free to send me an email, send me some submissions.
I cannot wait to share more stories with more people. All right, guys, thanks so much for tuning in and I will see you next time.
Wedding Demands, Ultimatums, and a Disney Honeymoon with Liz Fleming
Think weddings are all love and laughter?
In this episode, Christa spills the tea with Liz Fleming, life coach and founder of The Small Town Social, on setting boundaries and surviving wedding drama. From hosting epic events to managing moments that make you go “Did that really just happen?” Liz brings her A-game with hilarious stories and savvy advice.
The pair dives into juicy listener confessions, from overbearing in-laws to cringe-worthy pre-gaming fails at dry weddings. Liz breaks it all down with tips for staying cool, calm, and collected while keeping the good vibes rolling.
Whether you’re tying the knot, hosting a bash, or just here for the gossip, this episode will have you laughing, learning, and maybe even rethinking that bouquet toss.
Episode Chapter Markers
00:00 Introduction
01:26 Career Pivot and Life Coaching
03:13 Setting Boundaries and Event Hosting
04:43 Wedding Stories and Hot Takes
22:07 Wedding Day Drinking Dilemmas
24:08 Biggest Wedding Regret
27:10 Story Submission: Wedding Planning Woes
39:01 Weekly Confessions Game
Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
- Liz shares her journey from PR to life coaching and her passion for personal development.
- Discussion on the importance of setting boundaries in weddings and events.
- Juicy listener stories about overbearing in-laws and dry wedding dilemmas.
- Wedding speech disasters and how to handle unplanned drama.
- Liz’s advice on creating meaningful, joyful events while maintaining personal boundaries.
- Insights into the cultural expectations of big weddings versus intimate gatherings.
- Hot takes on viral wedding trends and why authenticity matters.
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
- “Boundaries are so crucial—they not only set the tone for your gatherings but also let everyone, including you, have fun.” – Liz Fleming
- “The most satisfied people are the ones who follow their gut, set boundaries, and stay true to their vision.” – Liz Fleming
- “It’s okay to involve your audience in events, but always have a plan—otherwise, it can totally spiral.” – Liz Fleming
- “If your wedding day puts such a financial strain on you that you’re going to enter your marriage with such a level of stress, it’s not worth it.” – Liz Fleming
- “I think it’s really important to respect people’s choices for their wedding, whether it’s big, small, or something in between—it’s their story.” – Liz Fleming
- “Boundaries are the name of the game—respectful no’s are a form of self-care.” – Christa Innis
- “It’s your wedding, not an entertainment reality show. Stay authentic to your relationship.” – Christa Innis
- “Weddings are so personal, and I feel like when couples stick to what makes sense for them, that’s when the magic happens.” – Christa Innis
Mentioned in the Episode
- The Life with Liz Podcast
- The Small Town Social
- GLOWcon: An annual women’s conference organized by The Small Town Social, focusing on personal development and community building.
About Liz
Liz Fleming is a multi-passionate entrepreneur, life coach, and founder of The Small Town Social, a personal development community focused on empowering women. With 20 years as an award-winning PR professional, Liz pivoted her career to help ambitious women step into their power and live joyfully.
Through coaching, hosting events, and her annual gathering, GlowCon, Liz helps women gain clarity and confidence in all areas of life. As a military spouse and mom, she brings a relatable, results-driven approach to guiding others toward transformation.
Follow Liz Fleming:
Join the Drama with Christa Innis:
Got Wedding Drama? We Want to Hear It!
Your stories make Here Comes the Drama what it is! Share your unforgettable wedding tales, hilarious mishaps, or unbelievable moments with us. Whether it’s a wild confession or a story worth a skit, we can’t wait to hear it.
Submit your story today: Story Submission Form
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A Team Dklutr Production
Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Christa Innis: Hi, Liz. Thank you so much for coming on.
Liz Fleming: Hey, Christa. It’s so nice to see you.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. I feel like we were just talking before recording, but I feel like time has gone so fast, and also feels like the blink of an eye. It’s like, time is so weird now.
Liz Fleming: Yeah. Time’s weird, but we just move on. We move through.
Christa Innis: We do. It just flies by. I’m so excited to have you on. Like I said, I thought of you right away because you are the host of your own podcast. You host events. You are so multifaceted. And so I thought you would be the perfect person to have on here and share your own hot takes.
And we’re going to play some games as we kind of go through. But first and foremost, can you kind of just share a little bit about yourself and what you do?
Liz Fleming’s Journey
Liz Fleming: Sure. Yeah, of course. I’m so excited to be here. This is going to be so much fun. It’s been a while since I’ve done a podcast interview, so I’m getting my juices flowing again, and the reason for that is that I have been in the thick of a total career pivot.
So as you know, Christa, because we used to do a lot of fun projects together, I was a publicist for 13 years. And I was presented with an opportunity to kind of slow down in my career, and I saw that as an opportunity to totally pivot and become a life and success coach.
So right now it’s just been amazing. You know, when you get that full-body feeling that you’re doing what you’re supposed to do. So I help women realize their purpose on purpose and realize their worth. And we can cover things from career, life, relationships, love, finances, whatever.
But the core of what I teach is really just helping women come back to wholeness so they can live more joyfully. And I have a set formula and a way that I do that. But, yeah, I’ve been in the thick of getting my certifications. So, I’m coming out on the other side of that and I’m just hitting the ground running. It’s just been amazing.
Christa Innis: I love that. I love that because I feel like what you said about when you find that purpose, that thing that really excites you, that is just like, cause it doesn’t feel like work. It just feels like, Oh, I get another day of doing this exciting thing and helping people and having a full impact, which is amazing.
Liz Fleming: Yeah, yeah, totally. And I forgot to mention too, like The Small Town Social, which you’re very familiar with, which is my women’s personal development group that kind of inspired the whole pivot to coaching because I host an annual gathering for women to focus on their self-healing. It just felt like coaching was my natural next step. So I have a lot of experience in event facilitation, which is going to make our conversation here really fun today. Yes. Yeah. It’s been awesome though.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Well, and as you’re talking too about what you do and your, like, how you kind of pivoted, that is perfect too because, and all these kinds of skits and stories that I share on my channel, it’s all about setting boundaries.
So many times these women have to deal with very difficult relationships or hard situations when growing up, they were taught to just be a people pleaser, just say yes, or just do what they tell you. And as we get older and we say no to things, we’re either told we’re difficult or we’re the B word.
So part of sharing these skits is like, you can do things respectfully. You can say no respectfully. So I feel like this is, you’re the perfect match to be talking on this podcast because you can share your take when it comes to setting boundaries and following your path of like, okay, that doesn’t serve me anymore. So let’s go this way.
The Power of Boundaries and Crazy Event Stories
Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. And that’s so spot on. And it’s so funny you mentioned that because I just did a whole podcast episode about setting healthy boundaries, specifically around the holiday season, but they really apply to life in general.
And especially when you’re hosting an event, whether you’re a bride, you’re hosting a birthday party, or someone like me who hosts large-scale events. Boundaries are so crucial, and they really help not only set the tone for your gatherings but also set you apart and allow everyone, including yourself, to have fun. So important.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I love that. So with that being said, let’s jump into my first segment here, which is any crazy stories, and then we’re going to get into wedding hot takes.
So right off the bat, I know we were kind of talking, and you said just like leading events, you kind of have different, you’ve seen different things, or you’ve seen it all just being at different things.
Do you have any crazy stories that come to mind or anything you’ve heard that you were kind of like, kind of shocking or like, oh my goodness?
Event Hosting, Wedding Speeches, and Hot Takes
Liz Fleming: What’s sticking out for me as an event host is I love to involve my audience in my gatherings as much as possible. I don’t like to stand on a stage all day and talk to the audience. I’ve done that before, and, you know, it works for everyone. They learn a lot, but it was just like—so over the last 6 and a half years of doing these events with The Small Town Social, I have really involved my audience, but you have to be cautious with that.
So things like passing around the microphone and doing group shares—you guys can totally apply this to wedding speeches and stuff—be so cautious about doing things like that. Have a plan. Don’t just go free for all and start doing the group share or letting someone have the mic and do a speech because it can really get away from you.
There’s not really one instance; I mean, it’s happened loads of times for me, which is terrifying. Someone is either too scared to talk, the microphone’s pressed into their face, and there’s not much you can do about it, or they’re nervous to start talking, and then they talk and don’t stop talking.
That’s a really big one where you’re just kind of like, “You need a game plan for that.” I have kind of a seasoned approach now, but for anyone interested in hosting events, or you have an event on the horizon, that’s like my number one thing: totally involve your audience so they have fun, but proceed with caution.
Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my God. I’m so glad you said that because that was something I shared. I don’t remember where I shared it now—it might’ve been in a story somewhere—but I was at a wedding once. I was a bridesmaid, and at the last minute, I want to say it was like a few weeks before the wedding, she brought on another bridesmaid. They had a falling out and then became friends again.
And the girl right off the bat was like, “Alright, I’m giving a speech,” like didn’t wait to be asked, just told her, “I’m going to give a speech,” and this bride was so nice, and she was just like, “Okay,” just accepted it. And after this bridesmaid made her speech, she goes, “Anyone else have anything to say?” which I was just like, you know—no.
Lines started forming of siblings of the bride and groom, cousins—we were sitting there for probably 30-45 minutes just listening to these unplanned speeches. And they were, like, not—you know, like, there are certain things you say and don’t say in a speech, and they were just saying everything. They were talking about sibling fights growing up, how they had a terrible falling out growing up, and why they did, and it was just like, “Is this really happening?”
Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. That’s so bad.
Christa Innis: That was so bad.
Liz Fleming: That’s like my nightmare. Actually, that is giving me flashbacks to my wedding because, yeah, more people made speeches than we knew. It was just kind of like, “Okay, all right.” It’s a boundary between respecting people, but also like, “I paid for this. This is my day,” kind of thing.
As long as you have a plan—like with how I run my events, I have outs. I have certain phrases that I say, and I’m very well-versed in how I present my body language. There are ways you can do that to change a conversation and change a vibe. You send the signal, right? The bat signal.
I have an amazing team helping me with these events, who are also well-versed in that. It makes it a lot easier to just kind of be like, “Okay, we’re going to take a pause here.”
The other reason why that’s scary is probably the most obvious—we live in a very sensitive time right now where everyone has different opinions, views, and thoughts on everything, and you just never know what someone’s going to say. I’m not trying to scare everyone away from the group because it is so powerful. Keep doing them. Just have an anchor—keep people focused.
Even, I mean seriously, for any event, you can do this. For weddings, keep it positive, keep it light. Focus on one thing, one memory. Don’t go down the rabbit hole of everything. And the same goes for more of a life-business-related event like what I do.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And I want to get to hot topics in just a second. But what you just said reminded me of this thing I saw—when you said there’s so much going on, like, we’re very opinionated, right?
I saw this TikTok where someone was sharing—and again, I don’t know what things I should say or not say yet—but in the bride’s father-of-the-bride speech, he talked about the election. He was so happy and came out wearing a hat, and I was just like, no, no, no.
And I guess she knew she had feelings that he was going to do this and was like, “Do not do it.” So she had already told him, “Do not do it.” And he still did it and made this about the election and not about her wedding, which I was like, “Come on!”
Liz Fleming: So that hurts. That hurts. It hurts a lot.
Christa Innis: Oh yeah. So that being said, let’s jump into some wedding hot takes. So I’m going to ask you a couple of questions here that are labeled as some kind of hot takes and tell me what you think.
Okay, let’s see. What is one wedding trend that you think needs to be retired for good and why?
Wedding Trends, Big Day Decisions, and Boundary Battles
Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. I think—oh, am I going to get canceled for saying this?—I think it’s like the elaborate aisle stuff. Like, can we just get down the aisle? Does it have to be an elaborate dance thing or, you know?
Christa Innis: Choreography, like a choreography dance or something?
Liz Fleming: Yeah, and maybe those are already over. I haven’t seen them in a while, but I just remember there was a time when they were the thing. And, I don’t know, how long have I been married? Seven years? Six years? Five years? I remember when I was planning my wedding, I was like, that’s not happening.
I feel like it’s more about the extreme displays of entertainment going viral. Because everyone’s recording people at the wedding, and I just miss when it was intimate and personal. Now it’s like a reality show sometimes, and I think that’s what needs to go. That’s what I’m trying to get at.
Christa Innis: Yeah. No, I totally see what you mean because I think we’re losing sight of what makes sense for our relationship and our wishes instead of going viral. You totally hit the nail on the head with that because I was just talking to someone about how we’re so caught up in what everyone else wants for our wedding day that we lose sight of it, like, “Wait, that doesn’t make sense for me.”
Like, I would never do that. Or when parents come in, they want to invite 500 people. It’s like, “Well, I’m very introverted, so that’s really uncomfortable for me.” The same way it’s like, “Oh, let’s do this viral dance so that maybe we have a chance of blowing up on TikTok.” Why? Why do you ask yourself, why do you want that?
Liz Fleming: Yes, exactly. It’s like the gender reveals—they’ve gone too far.
Christa Innis: Starting forest fires in California. Like, let’s not do that, people.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: We can just do it the old-fashioned way—bite into a cupcake or something. If you really need to, just have the baby and move on.
Liz Fleming: Just have the baby.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Okay, that was a good one. Do you think big weddings are worth the expense, or would you recommend keeping them small and intimate?
Liz Fleming: That’s totally subjective. I don’t want to crush anyone’s dreams. If someone wants a huge wedding, I think that’s awesome.
I personally feel that if your wedding day is going to put such a financial strain on you that you’re entering your marriage with a level of stress that takes away the joy, then it’s not worth it. I’m an advocate for small and intimate weddings that are messy, joyful, and true to the couple.
I think it’s really up to you, obviously, and your budget. Weddings have gotten so expensive. I know people who’ve done destination weddings for that reason. They’re like, “Well, if we’re going to spend big money, we’re just going to go overseas and do it.” That often makes it smaller and more intimate because fewer family members can go.
So, there’s this hybrid segment of weddings now, which I love. I’m like, that sounds fun. Maybe for our 10-year anniversary, we’ll do something awesome like that. But yeah, I’m all for being small and intimate at the end of the day.
Christa Innis: I think you make a really good point. It kind of ties back to people trying to impress others and not staying true to themselves.
If it’s in your budget or always your dream to have a big wedding, do it. Go all out. But if you’re going to be in $50,000 of debt, maybe rethink it. At the end of the day, the wedding is about celebrating your love, not pleasing everyone else.
Liz Fleming: You also have to consider cultural perspectives, right? In some cultures, big weddings are the norm, and there’s no other way. Like, that’s what you do. Conversely, some people don’t have big families, so they compensate by inviting all their close friends.
For them, a big wedding is worth it to bring all the people they care about together. So many variables go into the why behind someone’s wedding size. I’d love to see more people being respectful about it. You never know someone’s story or their why.
Christa Innis: A hundred percent. I always find that people who tune out the noise when planning and do what’s true to them are the most satisfied with their wedding.
So many people listen to everyone but themselves, then say, “I wish I could have a redo. I hated that it was so big, or so small.” Listen to your heart and plan for you.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Boundaries. Yes. Boundaries are the name of the game. Okay, next topic.
Christa Innis: The next segment is called “Pick a Side: Wedding Drama Debates.” So, I started asking social media to send me their unpopular opinions. I’m going to read a few, and we can debate them.
The first one says, “I don’t like the idea of a first look. My husband had to wait to see me until I came down the aisle.”
Liz Fleming: Well, I am all about shock and awe, so I don’t love the first-look thing. It’s really like, I don’t know, it feels like it kind of defeats the purpose. I get it, it’s nice to have that one-on-one moment. But to have that moment together, like, in front of everyone you care about, it sends out an energy that cannot be replicated. It’s like next-level good vibes, and I feel like the world needs more of that, so I’m in the camp of no first look.
Christa Innis: Yeah, if I had to pick one, I would say no first look, too. We didn’t do a first look because I was like, I always pictured that first walk down the aisle. It just seemed more climactic for me. But I get it—like people that have done it for timing purposes or scheduling, or maybe they were really shy and just wanted to get it out of the way.
Christa Innis: Okay, this next one says, “I hate the bouquet toss after 25. Nobody wants to be fighting for a bouquet.”
Liz Fleming: Oh, I don’t know. Twenty-five? Twenty-five? Holy crap. So young. I love the bouquet toss. I think it’s a great way to gamify your day. At that point, you’re more than halfway through the day. Your people have eaten, your guests have eaten, and the dancing is starting to happen. It’s just fun and fast, quirky, and doesn’t take up a lot of time. Do it.
Christa Innis: Did you have anyone push people out of the way, elbowing others, or maybe you didn’t see it as the bride?
Liz Fleming: Not aggressively. It was just a kind of jockey. Everyone was a little tipsy. I’ve been pushed out of the way at weddings I attended—it’s been like a mosh pit sometimes—but at my wedding, it was tasteful.
Christa Innis: Some people get really into it. I was scratched once, and it was so intense. Like, guys, it doesn’t mean you’re actually gonna get married next!
Liz Fleming: Yeah, you know your people best. You know your audience. I think that’s something you can pull out of the bag as you see fit. If your guests are likely to get drunk and belligerent, maybe it’s not something you want to do. There are ways to modify those age-old traditions.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And if you’re not athletic like me, maybe don’t do it either. I always worried I’d throw it wrong and knock someone out!
Liz Fleming: Also, if you skip it, you save money on that extra bouquet—like a hundred bucks saved right there.
Christa Innis: Okay, this last one says, “Pregaming a dry wedding is disrespectful to the bride and groom.”
Liz Fleming: Yes. I think that’s super rude. If the bride and groom made that decision consciously, it must be for an important reason. Respect it, then go drink afterward. It’s their day, not yours. Grow up and show up for your people.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I’ve never been to a dry wedding, but if I knew it was dry, I wouldn’t pregame—it’s just weird to me.
Liz Fleming: Yeah, let’s do shots in the parking lot. No thanks. Also, I think it’s weird when people get blackout drunk at weddings. The pictures are ruined, it’s a safety issue, and someone always ends up taking care of them. Alcohol is not the cornerstone of why we’re here.
Christa Innis: So true. I hear stories all the time about someone being so drunk they can’t even walk down the aisle or finish a speech. Let’s just hold off a little if you know you can’t handle it.
Liz Fleming: That was a hard line for my husband and me on our wedding day—no pregaming. I think I had one glass of champagne, and he maybe had a beer, just something to shake the nerves. It’s okay to have a little touch of that, but it’s not about taking away from the day or everything you’ve planned.
Christa Innis: Honestly, I thought I’d have more champagne the morning of, but I didn’t even finish my glass. I was running around so much with hair, makeup, and checking on things. The guys, meanwhile, just had to put on a suit and shower!
Liz Fleming: Same here. I wasn’t even drunk at my wedding—there was just no time. But can I share my biggest regret from my wedding?
Christa Innis: Yes, please do!
Liz Fleming: My biggest regret was putting the bride and groom’s table near the buffet entrance. Why did we do that?
Christa Innis: Wait, so your food table was where you sat?
Liz Fleming: Yeah, it was, but it was spaced out enough that I thought it would be fine. So, we were in a ginormous barn, and it was very elegant, and we had this beautiful, long buffet-style line of food. Our table was on the edge of the dance floor, and there was probably a 10-foot gap between where people went to get the food and our table. I think in my head, I was like, in this way, we’ll:
a) Be able to eat.
b) Get to see more people without having to go around the room so much.
It was a giant event, and because we tried to do that, we only made it to four tables. People just kept talking and talking, and you only have so much time. But then when we sat down to try and eat, it was just like one person after another coming up to us, saying, “Congratulations, we love you guys.” And it’s like, I think I took one bite of food.
I mean, that’s a big expense, and we were so hungry and thirsty. Our cheeks hurt, our hands hurt. That was my biggest regret—not being more mindful of our placement and where we sat.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Liz Fleming: …Our placement and where we sat.
Christa Innis: That’s such a smart thing to say because I’ve never actually heard someone say that before, but it’s true. You get very drawn into conversations.
I know my husband actually had to stop me because I wanted to go up to everyone. I’m that person who feels guilty and thinks, “Oh my gosh, I didn’t say bye to so-and-so, even though I said hi to them earlier.” And he was like, “It’s okay. There are 150 people here. If you don’t say hi to one person, it’s going to be okay.”
I was like, “Okay.” But yeah, we did this thing called Mission Impossible, which was really cool. It was our photographer’s idea. They played Mission Impossible music, and the DJ announced that we were going to go to each table and take a picture with everyone.
It allowed people to feel like they saw you, and we just quickly moved. One side of the table gets behind the other side, so we could easily just get in there. It made everyone feel like they hung out with the bride and groom for a little bit.
Liz Fleming: Oh, I wish we did that. I feel like there were more than half of the people I didn’t even get to talk to. We had about 152 guests, and I truly thought we’d get around to everyone.
I mean, we tried, and I would have loved to have talked to everyone. Some people I hadn’t seen in years or ever met before, but you can only do so much.
Christa Innis: It’s—
Liz Fleming: …So hard.
Christa Innis: It’s so hard, but as long as you’re having a great time on your day and your guests are also benefiting from that, you’ve won. You’ve won the lottery in terms of the wedding day.
Helicopter Parents and Wedding Hijacks
Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. All right. Let’s jump into this week’s story submission.
As a reminder to everyone listening, I get regular stories sent to me all the time. I probably have like 300 that I haven’t even touched the surface on. So, this is a random story that I’ve not read yet. We’re just going to react together. And if you’re listening, thinking, I have a story to submit, you can submit it through the link in the show notes. We’re always taking new submissions.
All right.
When my husband and I got engaged, we were so excited. We were dating for a long time, so we didn’t want to wait too long to get married. We got engaged on May 1st and were talking about getting married around the end or middle of June.
Oh wow, that’s fascinating.
So then my husband could go to some family events with me as a couple at the beginning of July. We sat down with my then fiancé’s parents, and they were asking if we had picked a date for the wedding yet.
I told them we were thinking about June 22nd. They said, “That’s only a month and a half away. We want to have a lot of time to get everything done.”
I told them I knew where I was going to get my dress, and I knew from other family members that getting a dress would be no problem as long as I was going to rent it. I was also going to have fake flowers and make bouquets and boutonnieres myself, so we didn’t need to ask a florist in advance.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Okay.
We were also not going to have our reception at an event center. We were planning on using a church for the reception, so we didn’t need to look for venues.
My father-in-law said, “That isn’t enough time to plan the other things that need to be done. And if we do it on July 22nd, then your fiancé’s older sister and her family, who live in Ohio, might not be able to attend since her husband is in the military. It would be hard for her to leave and come to the wedding.”
My fiancé and I had already talked about possible people who wouldn’t be able to attend the wedding. We came to the conclusion that it was our wedding, and if people couldn’t make it, then they couldn’t come.
My fiancé said, “Dad, we will just give people the date now so they can make arrangements.”
My father-in-law said, “That’s not how it works. You need to have everyone from the immediate family there for the wedding. So why don’t we do July 19th? Then your sister and her husband and family can come to the wedding since they will already be here.”
Why? Because they’re going to Disneyland that week.
Christa Innis: There’s a lot going on here.
Liz Fleming: Oh my God.
Christa Innis: There’s a lot of buildup here.
Liz Fleming: Poor bride.
Christa Innis: I know. Just getting ripped right from her. She knows what she wants. Leave her alone.
Liz Fleming: Yes.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh.
Christa Innis: Okay, here we go.
“That way you guys can have half of your honeymoon at Disneyland with all of us, which we would pay for. Wouldn’t that be fun?”
My then fiancé said, “Dad, we don’t really want to wait that long to get married since we’ve been dating so long. And we don’t really want to spend half of our honeymoon with you guys since it’s supposed to be just us.”
My future father-in-law said, “Oh, well, you’ll be in your own hotel room. You won’t be in the Airbnb with us in California, which I will pay for. You will also have a couple of days to yourself before the Disneyland trip. So you could go to St. George for a couple of days since it’s on the way to California.”
Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. We should pause there.
Christa Innis: Wow. Helicopter much?
Liz Fleming: Geez.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Like, sure, yeah, that’s a quick engagement, but it sounds like they’ve already talked it through and figured it out. There’s no need to come in and say, “Well, let’s do it this day, and then you can have your honeymoon with us.”
Liz Fleming: Yes, that’s tricky. I’m seeing it from both angles here. The bride and groom know exactly what they want—signed, sealed, delivered. Awesome.
Most parents would be supportive of that. However, I get where the parents are coming from because it’s such a milestone, right? They’ve probably had this grand vision as parents over the last 20 or 30 years of how their child’s wedding would go and how they would contribute. They probably felt totally left out.
Christa Innis: Well—
Liz Fleming: In most weddings, the parents are pretty involved. They love to pay for certain things. It sounds like there was just a massive disconnect in family chemistry when it came to the wedding.
But for the honeymoon thing? That’s creepy. That’s weird.
Christa Innis: Well, and I feel like the weird part of it too is—because I totally get you—it’s like, yeah, they visualize this day and want to help their kid. But it almost sounds like they are catering to the sister and her husband a little bit more.
It’s like, “Well, they have a trip planned to Disneyland, so we should get married right before that.” It sounds like they want the couple to combine their vacation with the sister’s family’s plans to make it more convenient for them.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: It’s kind of weird.
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s like they’re trying to make sure the sister, like the whole family, can be together. But as a military spouse, it doesn’t matter if you give a month lead time or ten months. The military is the military, and they might not be able to attend anyway. Like, they could just get called up for something.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: So that’s a little weird to me. But yeah, overall, it felt pretty disrespectful to react that way as someone related so closely to the bride and groom. It’s okay to have your opinions privately and maybe have that discussion. But to just insert yourself so directly into that moment? It just felt like she was being shut down at every turn. The poor thing.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Oh my goodness. And I hope there’s more like—
Liz Fleming: Oh, there’s more?
Christa Innis: There’s more.
Liz Fleming: Oh heavens.
Christa Innis: My fiancé said, “What if we do it on the 27th of June? That’s a weekend, and my sister still might be able to come since it’s a weekend. Then we have two months for whatever other planning we need to do.”
Future father-in-law said, “No, your sister will not be able to come down that weekend either. Ohio is a long way, and it costs a lot of money for her to come down to Utah. July 19th will be best for all of us.”
So again, saying no.
My fiancé then looked at me and said, “We will need to talk about this more than just for a second.” We left the room and talked about what we would want to do.
I said, “I’m really frustrated. I understand if she can’t come, but they are making assumptions that she won’t be able to make it to our wedding. They’re kind of speaking for the sister at this point, not even allowing her to answer for herself. If she really wants to come, I think she can make it happen. If she doesn’t want to come, then she won’t. This is supposed to be our wedding day, not your parents’. I want to get married in June.”
Liz Fleming: Yeah, there’s so much that’s not said in this story. We don’t know the backstory of the bride and groom and why they selected that date. Maybe there was a timeline—financial, career, or health reasons—you just don’t know.
Christa Innis: Yeah, exactly.
Liz Fleming: If anyone in my family ever said something like that to us, I’d be like, “No. What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you high?” I value your opinion, but this is what we decided. Get over it.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Exactly. It almost sounds like a weird control thing because they’re so set in July. And I’m like, what’s the big difference between June and July? To me, nothing.
Liz Fleming: Yeah, nothing. It’s less than a month. And when he said the thing about “I’m paying for it,” that was definitely a power play.
Christa Innis: I hate that.
Liz Fleming: Totally. It’s like, “I’m paying for it, so you’ll do what I want.”
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s so frustrating.
Liz Fleming: That’s tricky.
Christa Innis: So, after talking, the bride said, “I don’t want to cause drama in your family. And I feel like if we push for the 27th, it will just make things complicated with your parents. I guess we will have to do the 19th and just not make your parents go into a frenzy.”
My fiancé said, “Are you sure that’s what you want to do?”
I said, “It’s not what I want to do, but I guess it’s what we have to do to keep the peace.”
Liz Fleming: Ugh.
Christa Innis: They went back into the room and said, “I suppose we’ll do July 19th.”
The bride added, “I have other stories from my wedding, but this is already so long. Message me if you have any questions.”
Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. That makes me so sad.
Christa Innis: I know.
Liz Fleming: She was a baller about this. She was very clear about what she wanted, set her boundaries, and had the courage to say, “That’s not what I want.” And yet, she’s just put in this tricky position. Imagine if you were in her shoes, up against that mounting pressure from in-laws. Starting off your marriage with that kind of dark energy? Yikes.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I get why she felt the pressure to change her mind, but it sucks that she had to.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: All right. I think I did okay with reading that. I have to be honest—one time, I read a confession on Facebook, and someone commented, “Before you post anything, you should make sure you know how to read.”
Liz Fleming: People are so nice.
Christa Innis: Right?
Liz Fleming: That was a really long read. Way to crush it.
Christa Innis: And I should have probably broken it up a little bit.
Liz Fleming: No, I think it was great. I like that you read it in chunks so that we could talk about it along the way.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I’m learning as I go here. Okay, I know we’re overtime, so I’ll make this next section a little shorter. It’s called the weekly confessions game. I’ll just do one confession, and we’ll rate it.
Okay, so these people are sending me their confessions on Instagram now, and we’ll rate it from 1 to build tea and 10 to absolute chaos. And if you have something to add, feel free.
Okay, this is crazy: “My dad was my landlord and told me to use rent as my wedding gift, then made me pay it back the next month.”
Liz Fleming: People are so weird. What the fuck? I guess. I don’t, like, what? Why are you paying it back? That’s not a gift. That’s a loan.
Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s literally a loan.
Liz Fleming: An interest-free loan.
Christa Innis: Positioned as a gift. People are so strange.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Okay, I’m just going to read this other one real quick, and we’ll close out.
“Yes. In-laws insisted on staying at the hotel and then arrived one minute before the entrance of the bridal party.”
Liz Fleming: That’s making a statement.
Christa Innis: Yeah, that was done on purpose.
Liz Fleming: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. This is crazy. Thank you so much for coming on, Liz. I know. I’m like, what other stories can we read? This was so much fun. I really enjoyed having you come on and catching up. Can you tell us again where everyone can follow you, what other projects you’re working on, and all that good stuff?
Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. Everyone can find me on Instagram—that’s my favorite. So, you can find me at @thesmalltownsocial on Instagram or at @MsLizFleming. I have two accounts.
And then, yeah, all the links are there. I share a ton of content. You can work with me one-on-one in coaching.
I think the biggest thing I have coming up, even if you’re not local to North Carolina, is a women’s personal development gathering called GlowCon on March 20th, 2025. The majority of women are here in North Carolina, but I have some women flying in from as far as Ohio, California, Washington, Virginia, and Vermont.
So it’s really grown. This is the second time I’m doing it, but it’s such a beautiful day of community, connection, getting to know yourself better, and just having some fun on the first day of spring.
So, a lot of stuff going on for little ol’ me, but I would love to connect with you all, and this has been wonderful, Christa. Thank you.
Christa Innis: Of course! Yay, I’m so excited. This is awesome.
