My new book Here Comes the Drama: A Ferris and Sloan Story is live!
Here’s your engagement, your champagne… and a complimentary family drama on the side.
What was meant to be a romantic waterfall engagement turned into a champagne ambush, sister betrayal, and a bridal shop break down. From body-shaming comments to financial manipulation, this submission spirals fast, but thankfully, so do the boundaries.
This week, The Cliffnotes Gal joins Christa to break down family control tactics, engagement sabotage, and what happens when your own sister crosses the line. Known for turning viral chaos into sharp, fast recaps, she brings her no-nonsense perspective on authenticity, trauma boundaries, and staying real online.
Listen in for green-flag fiancé moments, hard truths about toxic parents, and the reminder that protecting your peace isn’t dramatic, it’s necessary.
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Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
- Engagement Hijacked – What should’ve been a private waterfall proposal quickly turned into a champagne ambush with mom and her friends cheering from the sidelines.
- Passed Out at Her Own Wedding – A diabetic low mid-vows left The Cliffnotes Gal with a blackout ceremony, a brain fog reception
- Blessing Revoked – Dad agrees to the engagement, until he doesn’t… and suddenly claims he never gave his approval.
- The Boundary Reset – When money, guilt, and ultimatums escalate, the only option left might be choosing peace over family pressure.
- “If They Don’t Know Your Birthday…” – The Cliffnotes Gal’s rule of thumb for wedding guest lists: no birthday knowledge, no invite.
- Sister Seduction Scandal – Two weeks after the engagement, the bride’s own sister begins telling the fiancé she’s the “better option.”
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
- “Perfection. This is so fake. It is so fake.” -The Cliffnotes Gal
- “Perfection doesn’t happen. That’s the thing.” -The Cliffnotes Gal
- “If it’s not positive and bringing you joy, then why have it?” -The Cliffnotes Gal
- “They haven’t proven that they’re worthy enough to be there.” –The Cliffnotes Gal
- “If they don’t know your birthday, they don’t need to be there.” –The Cliffnotes Gal
- “I think it’s like we wanna continually give chances, especially for family or people we’ve known for a long time.” -Christa Innis
- “You need to be firm with your boundaries now.” -Christa Innis
- “That’s why people stay in like toxic family relationships for so long because they’re like, well, it is family…But no one deserves to be treated that way” -Christa Innis
- “They want real people with real content.” -Christa Innis
- “Blood is thicker than water… I think they’re using that as a manipulative tactic.” -Christa Innis
*This conversation is for entertainment and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. Please seek a licensed professional for your specific situation.
About The Cliffnotes Gal
The Cliffnotes Gal is the internet’s trusted shortcut through chaos. This viral storyteller transforms long, winding TikTok sagas into one-minute recaps.
She built a platform by saying what everyone else took 15 minutes to say, in just a minute or two. With 20 million views on TikTok, and a notebook full of handwritten recaps, she shortens the noise without losing the nuance. Her approach to content is rooted in respect: for the storyteller, for the audience, and for herself.
Cliff Note: She saves your lunch break and your attention span.
Follow The Cliffnotes Gal
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A Team Dklutr Production
Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Christa Innis: Hi, welcome to the podcast. Hello. Thanks for coming on. So you are the Cliffnotes Gal, and I know many people know of you as a Cliffnotes Gal, but kind of to get started, how, how, like who are you and how did you get into summarizing these long stories? I remember the first, well, and I can talk about it later, but the first time I saw you, it was just like, this is saving me so much time.
You cover all these amazing, um, stories into a quick little summary. So I know that wasn’t
Cliffnotes Gal: so
Christa Innis: long way
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. Showing my age here, but it’s happened during COVID, I did the typical, like I needed a break from being bored in the house, which when I say that I think of that song off the top of my head. I’m bored in the house and I’m bored in the house.
Yeah. Mm-hmm. Um. I would take 20 minutes every day as my lunch break. I would go learn a new dance and I would do it and I would record it. And one of the days I decided I didn’t wanna learn a new dance, I was just gonna scroll and find stories. And I don’t remember what the story was about, but there was this long drawn out story that I watched for probably, I think I watched probably 10 videos.
’cause that’s back when like videos had to be shorter on TikTok. And by the time I got to the end, I was like, I just wasted like 15 minutes of my lunch break when this person could have said it in a minute.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: And I was so annoyed. And so I stitched one of the parts and just said. This is what the story was about here.
It’s over in a, here’s the whole story in less than a minute. And I spoke really, really fast. Um, and it blew up. I mean, blew up millions of views when all of my videos were just like me doing dance trends. Um, ’cause I am a dancer as well. I’ve, I, I did ballet, I did Point and Lyrical for 14 years. Um, I do hip hop now and love to dance.
But yeah, it blew up. And then I didn’t know what to have as my name at that point. It was called something else, Southern something, I think. And uh, I was like, y’all, what do I call myself? And I still have the screenshot during COVID of someone saying, well, you’re doing the cliff notes. And since you’re like Southern Gal something.
You should just be the Cliffnotes Gal. And I have yet to repost that clip and I need to, ’cause I have the screenshot telling that person, like, thank you so much. Um, so I became the Cliffnotes Gal and so showing my age, some people don’t know what Cliffnotes are, um, really teenagers today, they see her and they have no idea who the Cliff notes or what the Cliff notes is.
Um, so for anybody watching this, back in the day when I was in high school, in college, if there was a book that you had to read and you had a test coming up on it, you wanted to get the shorter version of it so you didn’t have to read the 500 pages. So there was this yellow and black book that existed for every book out there called Cliff’s Notes.
’cause his name was Cliff I think. And it was Cliff’s Notes. And that shortened the story. And so you were able to read the Cliff’s Notes to get the shorter version of the book and then go take the test on it.
Christa Innis: Oh my.
Cliffnotes Gal: So I do the shorter versions of TikTok stories.
Christa Innis: So I just learned something from you because I, I remember Cliff, cliff notes.
Is it Cliff’s Notes or Cliff? Cliff Notes Cliffs. I dunno. Cliff.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah, it’s Cliffs.
Christa Innis: Cliff’s Notes. Okay. But I remember as a website in high
Cliffnotes Gal: school. Oh was it? Yeah. Oh my gosh.
Christa Innis: Actual show. I don’t, that
Cliffnotes Gal: even shows my age even more.
Christa Innis: I was like, I don’t remember an actual book, but maybe I’m like, I don’t know if thinking of the wrong thing.
’cause I do remember people using Cliff’s notes for books in high school.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
Christa Innis: And I don’t know, I, I’m sure I did. I don’t really remember. I just remember hearing about Cliffs Notes and, yeah. That’s wild. But I was talking about it to someone recently, how like, I remember doing like book reports and like middle school and high school and having to actually like pull out like.
All the encyclopedias and reference it. And I’m like, kids these days they can just Google or whatever they, gosh. Using, using ai. It’s like all their stuff and I’m like, are they even learning? I don’t even know. Like what?
Cliffnotes Gal: And there, there was something else that came out after Cliff’s Notes. I think it was called SparkNotes.
Christa Innis: SparkNotes, yes.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yes. That’s SparkNotes came out after. But back when Cliff’s Notes existed for me, it was a physical book that you went to the bookstore. It was yellow and black and you went and bought it and it was a paperback
Christa Innis: Wild.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. Golly. I feel old.
Christa Innis: No, honestly, like it probably was around for me. I just don’t really remember.
I just remember, I remember SparkNotes now that you say that, but
Cliffnotes Gal: Well, if you remember SparkNotes then you definitely weren’t around for the paperback version of Cliff’s Notes. Because I never used SparkNotes because that was way after I graduated high or college.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. That’s so funny. Yeah. That’s so funny.
’cause people are probably like that younger generation. They’re like, oh, cliff Snow. That’s so clever. She came up with, well it’s funny ’cause one of, one of my skits that I did, so I like, will come up with character names from movies that I grew up watching or like shows I watch. ’cause it helps me remember like, oh, the mom’s so and so dad so and so because I call them by the wrong name.
People would call me on, they’d be like, no, the sister was Ashley, not Anna, or whatever. And so one day I did, um, characters from Ferris Beeler’s Day Off. I just like, it was a movie I grew up watching all the time. And so I just like grabbed like Ferris and Sloan and like, I ended up changing the names later ’cause it was like I turned into a book and I was like, I don’t want the same names.
Anyway, so I made a vid a video talking about how like, yeah, these names came from this movie and all these people were like, what’s that movie? And I was like. How old are you? This is like a staple in my house growing up.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yes.
Christa Innis: So it was just kind of funny. I was like, oh, I just assumed everyone knew that movie, but
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah.
Christa Innis: Wrong on me.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. Uh, I grew up with like, I loved the Breakfast Club. Um, I loved Dirty Dancing, but they think Dirty Dancing is that rough remake that came out that
Christa Innis: I’ve not even seen that one. I refuse to
Cliffnotes Gal: Don’t waste your Time.
Christa Innis: Some that are remake, I’m just like, no, no, thank you. If they ever, I don’t think they could remake Breakfast Club.
That’s just, that’s another classic. Love that.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. I, I gave the second dirty dancing about 20 minutes of my time and I said, I’m good.
Christa Innis: Really?
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. Yeah. It was rough. It was rough.
Christa Innis: Okay, so kind of back to your, your channel and everything like, so it kind of started, you said like unexpectedly, like, did you ever think you would become like a viral creator that like has this big platform or.
Cliffnotes Gal: I had no intentions of that. And I’ll be honest with you, I still don’t feel like I am. Um, I’m in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, and so Louisiana is a small state. Uh, it’s funny when I’m in parades, uh, like I ride in the St. Patrick’s Day parade every year, and it never fails. Every time I’m on a float, like people are screaming from the street, like the Cliff Notes gal to throw beads to them.
Um, but it’s hard to, I’m just, and so many people say this and it pisses me off when they say it because like when they say, I’m just an everyday person, uh, I, I really am and I try to be my page. I try and stay like me to the core. So I will tell stories. In my pajamas. I will tell stories with rough ass hairdos.
I don’t wear makeup hardly ever. Um, I don’t really wear makeup much anyway. The only thing that you’ll normally see on me is earrings and a necklace because I love jewelry. Mm-hmm. Um, but I try and stay as real as possible because there are so many people that I used to follow and I’m so happy for them that their pages have grown.
Like that’s awesome for them. But I have slowly watched them change. Mm-hmm. And I don’t want to become that. I want to still be the person when I did my first Cliff notes. And I hope that my viewers still see that by comments. It sounds like they still do. I try and stay respectful with the stories that I do.
Um, but at the same time, it’s uh, it’s weird having a platform because. I do wanna make sure that every so often a video that I do, I feel like I’m making a difference. I don’t, it’s a little draining to continue constantly doing things that are like just stupid ass drama. Mm-hmm. Um, or things that are really, really, really intense and can affect people.
Mm-hmm. It can be extremely draining because some of these stories take a long time, and I have, I should have brought it with me. I have a notebook, um, that it is thick as hell and it’s my second notebook because I take so many notes watching these stories, and then I refer to the notes when I’m retelling them and try to memorize as much as I can.
Every so often I’ll have to use a teleprompter to remind me of notes that I need to discuss while I’m telling the story. But, um. It’s just weird. Like I still, I’m still a normal person. I’m still, I, I hope people see me that way. ’cause I don’t ever wanna come across as like fake as hell out there.
Christa Innis: Yeah. No, I totally understand what you’re saying though, because like you do see some accounts that automatically change to like, let me show off what I own.
Let me show you this. Yeah. And I, and I know you’re just saying like, I hate when people say that, but like, I, I’ve, there’s been this couple times where I’ve been out in my town and someone will be like, I, I love your videos like this. And they feel like really, like, uncomfortable, like, not uncomfortable, but they’re like, almost like celebrity.
Like, they’ll be like, oh, can I get a pic? Like, I love your videos. You’re my, I’m your biggest fan. I’m like, I’m a normal, like I’m swear to God. Yeah. I’m very normal. I have a toddler running around half the time, half the time I’m like wearing pajamas at home. Like I am very. Weird mother. Just, I don’t know, like, I’m just me.
Cliffnotes Gal: That’s awesome though. Like, stay that way. I was, so, my husband and I, um, every year we go to a small town in Louisiana. It’s called Minden, Louisiana. When I tell you it is the epitome of a, um, a hallmark town. So it is the type of town to where it’s, the downtown is like two main streets, but you’ve got like the cute little coffee shop where they, they roast their own beans and you’ve got like a couple of restaurants and you’ve got a couple of shops, but it’s like mm-hmm.
True Hallmark Town. Well, we were down there for Christmas and I went into one of the clothing shops, which is like a, it’s like a thrift shop. It’s called Purvey. It’s owned by a woman named Sarah, who is from Menen, I believe,] born, raised. And her mission is to, um, take like dilapidated, dilapidated, dated whatever homes and buildings and like bring them back to like life.
And she’s done an amazing job. And so we went down there, we stayed in one of her cottages that was absolutely gorgeous. It inspired my background. The room that we stayed in at her cottage had this beautiful floral background, so that’s the reason why I got this. Um, but anyway, we went to Purvey. We were shopping in there and I was looking at the record, uh, collection that they had, and this woman tapped me and she was like, are you, are you the Cliff Notes gal?
And I was like, I am. And so we chatted for a few minutes. And then they went to go, she went to go leave and she was like, it’s so nice to meet you. I was like, it’s awesome to meet you too. Like, I hope y’all have a Merry Christmas. And then her husband is like, well wait, babe, don’t you wanna get a picture with her?
And she was like, no, no, no. I don’t wanna ask her for that. I don’t wanna ask her. It’s like, no, we can totally, like, we can take a picture. So I could tell like she wanted to, but so I’m so glad that her husband said something because I tell people they, the people will leave stuff in the comments like, oh my gosh, I saw you at such and such in town.
And I’m like, y’all come say hello. Um. Don’t, like, don’t come attack me, but like, come say hello like I am, we’re from the south. Like I am so happy to say hello. And I mean, I’ve had people that, like, we’ve been out to dinner at a restaurant and they have been so absolutely polite. It was another young couple that came up to us while I was at the table and they were super polite.
I think that there is, there is a polite way to address people and there is a non-police way. Yeah. Um, just be polite and, and I’m super happy to like say hello and chat and take pictures or whatever. Yeah, yeah. It’s fun.
Christa Innis: Yeah, no, definitely. I feel like, I feel like that’s like the beauty of like social media and storytelling is like the connection that you can make and like, um, like I’ve met so many amazing people and just like through doing this podcast, ’cause like I was just saying, I’m like, most of the time I’m with my husband and my daughter and we just do our own thing.
I work from home. So it’s like, this is a great way to like meet other people. ’cause like, I don’t, you know. Do all, I don’t know, I guess I don’t like, yeah, go to an off regular office and all that stuff. Um, but I love that, that’s, it’s cool the connections you can make of people, um, you know, all over and obviously you’re making an impact because people are, feel like they know you in some way to be able to like go up and like say hello.
So. That’s awesome.
Cliffnotes Gal: I appreciate it.
Christa Innis: Yeah. So when you, okay, so it kind of started off where you were like, these videos are taking so long, so I’m gonna make them shorter. Right. So how do you now select which videos to do and how do you know they’re gonna be worth your while? Or do you watch some and you’re like, I don’t even know if it’s worth it, or do you get tagged in a lot of videos?
Like how do you select those?
Cliffnotes Gal: So I am super, super thankful to the followers because I wouldn’t find any of these stories if it weren’t for them. My entire FYP on TikTok is animals and sourdough bread. Uh, that’s about it. That’s about it. And so I’m typically not scrolling and seeing, I don’t see any of this stuff on my FYP, so I wake up in the mornings, kind of like what my routine is, is I’ll wake up in the mornings and I’ll scroll in the mornings before I start, like my actual real job.
And I’ll see how many tags I’ve got. Majority of the mornings, it’s about anywhere from a hundred to 200 tags. Most mornings if I wake up and there’s only a short few, I can typically scroll through and watch a few seconds of the tags to figure out which video I wanna do. If there’s a lot of them. I actually wait until that.
And I’ll have to scroll the hundreds of tags. Mm-hmm. If there is a certain video that I find I’m being tagged in more, that’s normally the one that I will settle on. Um, and then I just put in my headphones and I sit in bed and I write notes for however long it takes me to get through all the parts. I will do it in one night, so then it’s fresh.
I will then type out the notes that I want to talk about and then every day I film or record outside after I finish my day job. Um, I normally do it around like six or seven o’clock while the sun is still up and I give myself two takes. That is it, it again comes back to me like I try to be as real as possible.
So when IF up in a video, I talk over myself a lot and I mess up words. I don’t go back and rerecord ’cause I ain’t got time for that.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I love that you do.
Cliffnotes Gal: I’m a mom as well, so if IF up on it, you’re gonna see me f up on it.
Staying Real in a Filtered World
Christa Innis: Yes. I need to get better at that. That’s, I love that you do that because like, uh, it’s like, I don’t know if it’s like from working in social media marketing, I’m like, I’m always like overthinking how I sound.
Plus like, people are so like critical in comments sometimes that I’m like, oh, did I pronounce that word wrong? Or whatever. But like, I think people love to see real like that. Like, um, I was talking to someone re recently and I’m like, people don’t like the over performance anymore. They’re so turned off by it.
They want real people with real content
Cliffnotes Gal: Perfection. This is so fake. It is so fake. Um, again, I don’t need to have perfect hair. I don’t have some, some videos. If you go and scroll back on my videos, you will see I didn’t even brush my hair. Literally didn’t brush my hair. I threw it in a ponytail because the notes were like fresh in my brain and I was like, I’m just gonna go hurry up and record it right now.
Um, but yeah, perfection is not, perfection doesn’t happen. That’s the thing.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: So I would highly encourage you, like, you don’t need to, you don’t need to fix it if you messed up on the word, so be it. If you like trampled over your words and messed up on ’em, still use it. I mean, I’d rather see someone being more real than having to cut something out because it wasn’t perfect.
Then you rerecorded it and you put it back in there. But then I can tell it’s a cut because you went to the next part.
Christa Innis: Right.
Cliffnotes Gal: It’s um, yeah, there’s too many people trying too hard. And the thing is, is the viewers can tell like they’re not stupid. Yeah. They can tell.
Christa Innis: Oh yeah. Yeah. And I think too, it’s like that, I feel like it was like pre TikTok, that like Instagram of like the perfect photos.
Oh gosh. Crisp and clean and editing them. And then people just realized like, most of us don’t have time for that shit. Like, no,
Cliffnotes Gal: no,
Christa Innis: we’re busy, we’re wanting to work, we’re taking care of kids, dogs, whatever, whatever it is. And it’s like, we don’t have time to like, make everything crisp and clean and um, it’s more relatable too.
I feel like, like when I see someone that’s just like jumped on their bed and they’re like, Hey, and they just start talking. I’m like, I’m so much more intrigued. I’m like, we’re friends hanging out.
Cliffnotes Gal: Like talk to me like we’re on FaceTime. Mm-hmm. And I’m gonna be more intrigued listening to your video than if you just sat there to just be a robot.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: And I find that like, some people are like that with. Brand deals, which I mean, shit. Oh, I don’t know if I can cuss on your podcast. Sorry. Oh, you’re fine. Yeah. Oh, okay. Uh, I’m like, get get the bag. Like definitely get the bag, but at the same time, don’t get the bag for something that you wouldn’t actually use.
Um, there are a lot of creators out there, and especially I find with like facial products or even like shampoos or conditioners or something, if you’re gonna review a product, can you, like, I need you to truly, truly use it. Like really, really, really use it. Don’t tell me you used it for two weeks and then it’s the most amazing thing that you used when for whatever product that is, you know damn well it would take a good like three to six months of you using that product to see it like in action.
Christa Innis: Yes, because too, I find that when people are so inauthentic, then it makes people that are authentic, like harder to. Come across. I dunno if that makes the sense. Right, makes sense. I
Cliffnotes Gal: totally understand what you’re saying. Yes,
Christa Innis: because I’ve had people I remember. I like, I’m very selective and I remember, um, this brand that I actually used in my own wedding, birdie Gray.
Not obviously not sponsor, I’m just like saying like, they, I use ’em in my own wedding. I’ve worn ’em for many bridesmaids dresses. And I was stoked when they like, actually wanted to work with me. ’cause I was like, I’ve used this, I’ve worn their dresses like three or four times now. And there were comments like, oh my gosh, another ad.
And I’m like, no. Like legitimately I love them. And meanwhile, like I was like, I, I say no to like, like someone asked about like a dog product. I’m, I don’t even have a dog, so I’m not, why would I do that? Or like, there, I’ve never heard of this brand before. Why am I gonna say yes to that? Um, and I think it makes people then untrustworthy because they’re like, oh, well I saw this girl talk about this product.
I know she doesn’t use. So it’s,
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: My, my people receive emails all the time for brands and they’ll forward them to me, and I’m like, why? Why do they feel like the Cliff Notes gal would be good to promote a treadmill? Like, what did you get from my page that talks Fitness? Nothing like, yes. Nothing at all.
And then I had one the other day for like a weight loss app, and I was like, when have I ever spoken? Like, you don’t know my page clearly. You don’t know my page. You saw the number of followers and you thought, Hey, let’s see if she’ll do something.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Not gonna work.
Christa Innis: That was like, I remember I used to watch Bachelorette years ago.
I haven’t watched in many, many years, but I remember as soon as The Bachelorette or whatever would get off. Their season, they’d do like the waist trimmer and this, and I’m like, I know you did not wear a waist trimmer before getting on at this. I just know you didn’t. Yeah. And they’d talk about the tummy teas and all this.
Oh, I always drink my tummy tea. And I’m like, did you really? And it was just so inauthentic because they immediately got off the show and they have all these deals for these things. And I’m like, these are all about weight loss and working out and all this. And I’m just like, I, I don’t buy it.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. I’m like, and I love, I love that like, they have these opportunities to make money.
I really do. Because I mean, at the end of the day, them doing what they’re doing, it’s a job. Um, they are out there to make some money. But I think that there’s a, there’s a line that, that you have to choose if you wanna cross. And a lot of people do cross it. I’m not one of those, um, people consistently ask me about my, about face stuff.
And I have told them I have used the same products. I’ve never switched since before. No, I think it was around COVID. Um, fetish is all I use and it’s, it was started by someone, her name’s Jenna. She was a, a DJ on a really, really popular show called Kid Crowd. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of Kid Crowd in the Morning.
It’s a syndicated radio show. It was when radio shows were extremely, extremely popular, like the morning shows. And I would listen every single day. And I started listening to that show when I was probably like 10 years old. Well, she realized that there was a miss in, I guess facial world, makeup industry, whatever you wanna say.
Not makeup, but, um, rosacea and like, uh, all of that stuff was happening. Redness in the skin and acne, all of that. And she realized there was a miss for facial products with, um, like hemp in them, or not. THC what’s the other thing? CB. C, BD, thank you. There was a miss in the, in, in the area there, there wasn’t anything with CB, D in it.
And so I had always had really bad rosacea on my face, and I liked the radio show, so I was like, you know what, let me try it. And so she was kind of doing both things, kicking off the company and then doing the radio show. And so I bought just the lotion and I was like, let me see what this does, girl, when I tell you within like a week I was not having any redness on my face anymore.
It just took a week. And so from there, every single time this woman comes out with something new, I, I buy it right off the bat. So like if I, I’ve done a video before, like if I show off my entire fetish skin line, it is, it’s everything. It’s lotions and soaps and serums and, and like. Everything. So again, like anyone reaching out to me to promote like makeup or facial stuff, I’m like, no, because I know what works and I’m an actual customer and can show proof of the thousands of dollars I’ve probably spent with them over the years.
Um, and again, like if you’re gonna tell me a lotion works, you are gonna say, you got it from the TikTok shop two weeks ago. Like, that’s bullshit. That’s, you can’t tell me it works in two weeks.
Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my gosh, that’s so funny. Yeah, I know. I, yeah, I was saying too, like with working and, and marketing too, I think I can like kind of read between the lines with little people.
My, my husband gets like pulled into marketing things sometimes. He’ll be like, oh, well it’s half off. And I’m like, what was the price last week? You know, like, I’m like, I can see that kind of stuff. It’s, it’s kind of funny to notice that. Um,
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I kinda, I kind love when it, if you’re able to like, with this growth, like stay like true to you and like.
Share these stories. I feel like it’s, it is obviously like making an impact and feel liking. ’cause like I said, the first time I came across your page I was like, oh, this is saving me so much time because like, I don’t have time to sit and watch these like, long things. But, but then if you like miss out on some of the drama, you’re like, that’s what everybody’s talking about.
So what’s what’s going on in the TikTok world? Yeah. Is there anything like going on right now that’s like, that’s popping into your head? I’m trying to think if there’s like a current TikTok drama
Cliffnotes Gal: that’s, oh gosh. Um,
Christa Innis: spot. I just was
Stories She Refuses to Tell
Cliffnotes Gal: like, the most recent video that I did, I think was about a girl who went and tried on a dress at a boutique for a prom dress.
Um, but she actually only came out with her story time because another person posted a video recording because they overheard what was going on in the dressing room next to them. And so, oh, they pressed record recording the conversation in the dressing room next to them. And it was allegedly, it was the owner of the store, kind of like belittling a 17-year-old girl who was trying on a dress.
It was a couture dress, and the owner was telling her, you are too big for it. I don’t want you chew to put it on and ruin my dress. And so that recording came out and that was out for quite a few days. And I guess the girl finally was like, well, I guess I need to say like, Hey, this was me. And now a ton of stuff has come about with this owner.
There was an, I just saw, I was tagged in another story time before you and I got on this podcast. Um, I’m tagged in another story time about the same store. And this is another girl. This is a woman telling a story. Now I think she said she was 35. She had the exact same type of issue at that store and dealt with the owner.
So I haven’t watched her video the full way through, but, um, I get, I get a wide variety of tags from. Stories like that to break up drama to really, really intense things that are triggering. Um, and I’ve, I’ve told people plenty of times and I appreciate the tags, but there are stories that I just will not shorten ones that I feel like are extremely traumatic to the person telling the story.
There was one I was tagged in recently about a woman who was pregnant and I think like her husband tried to like her, um, and his girlfriend was trying to help on a live her. And I was like, whoa,
Christa Innis: gosh.
Cliffnotes Gal: Like I wanted to be like, why are you even tagging me in this? And so I responded to the tag and I was like, this is extremely traumatic for the person who posted this.
I will not be doing this story.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, and I let people know that like, if it is a, a really truly traumatic story for someone, please don’t tag me in it because like. I’m not taking that story from them. They’re probably using this story time as a way of healing for themselves. Yeah. Like I’m not taking that, um, I also will not do, and typically don’t do stories that deal with sa.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, because I’m a survivor myself and I’m a childhood SA survivor, so I had a lot, I had some traumatic things happen to me when I was 12 and 13 years old, but of course it’s still like very much real. Mm-hmm. And it’s affect, it affects me. And so anytime there is a story that deals with SA or physical abuse, um, domestic violence, I typically will not do those either.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, so yeah. Yeah. I try and focus on the ones that are more lighthearted and sometimes I get tagged on stories. People want me to shorten their own stories ’cause they’re like, look. I’ve got five videos out here. It’s not being pushed out. I really wanna get my story out, but I’m not good at telling a story.
And they actually ask me to do Cliffnotes for their stories. Wow. And so when that happens, I try and do that, and then I try and stay respectful. TikTok has this thing called duets and stitches.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: If their duets or stitches are on, I’m under the assumption that they’re okay with this video being shared or being talked about, or whatever the case.
And so those are stories. If I’m tagged in them and I’m interested in doing it, if their duets or stitches are on, I will normally, I will consider doing that story. If they are off, then I will comment on the person who tagged me, and I will tell them that I’m not doing it because their duets and stitches are off.
So I make sure I have a pinned video on my page that says like, I will only do ones with duets and stitches on. Um, because there are a lot of pages out there that are gossip pages. They could give two shits about if your duets and stitches are on. Um, when you put a video out there, it’s out there.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Uh,
Christa Innis: well it’s, it’s wild how like, quickly things travel to, or how quickly things might go viral. Like I’ll notice something. I’m trying to think of what I’ve seen. Like, I mean, the different accounts I follow where maybe someone was really rude at a store. Mm-hmm. And before you know what that person’s face is everywhere that Karen or whatever you wanna call him, and I’m like, oh my gosh.
Like the same day you’ll see ’em on like five accounts and I’m like, they take their video down, but I’m like, Ooh, it’s it, you’re, you put out into the abyss. It’s everywhere now. Um. So it’s, it’s wild how something will get picked up and it’s just like, that was the thing. I mean, it just got on the right person’s FYP or whatever, and they just shared it or someone saw it and they’re like, I need to talk about this.
Yeah. Um, yeah. ’cause that’s, that’s the power of social media I guess.
Cliffnotes Gal: It really is. And I mean, these apps are global, so it might not kick off in the us. Like I have followers that tag me from other countries and it’s crazy because sometimes there’s a really extremely viral video in Canada and all of the tags are from Canadians.
Wow. Like in Canada. And so when I do this, when I’ll do whatever story. Um, then it comes back and people are commenting the US like, this hasn’t been on my FYP. I’m like, well, because it’s in Canada, but it’s still a good story. Like
Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. It’s wild how like, um, like I had Lucette who’s on my podcast and she lives in, she’s in Australia.
And as soon as I had her, then I started getting some more like Australia like videos from Australia on my feed. But it’s like, until then I was like, not, and now I’m like, oh, now I’m kind of in here a little bit. ’cause it kind of sees me like commenting on her stuff. I don’t know what it is.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Um, but yeah, it’s like, you don’t, you don’t necessarily think about that.
But that’s, that’s one of the reasons too, like, I don’t put my child on social media at all. ’cause I’m like, I don’t ever want someone to take her face or, you know, especially, she’s so little and I’m like, she can’t consent to it. And just people don’t think I, when they put their kids on social media, how quickly someone can grab that.
Like, they might be like, oh, this is such a cute moment, post it. Someone can take that and be like, this is weird that this happened. Or look at this in the background. And then their, their kid is everywhere then.
Cliffnotes Gal: My kid is uh, not in my videos. And if he is, it is completely his decision and I do not allow his face to be seen.
So if you ever see him in a video, he is so far in the background that his face is a blur, but he’s back there in the background doing something funny that he has decided to come up with, um, or he’s in a mask. So yeah, his face has never been on my social media. It never will. Even when he is not a minor, it still won’t be, but anytime he is in one, it is because he wants to be.
And he has asked me to be, and he just likes being a little silly goofball in the background. And my husband has done a couple with him as well. Like I remember I did one, I think it was a few months ago, and I was in the backyard of course, telling the story like I normally am. And they’re both in the background sword fighting, I think.
And so my son had a sword, but my husband, I think was using like a broom. And then he fake stabbed him and my son like fell to the ground and then stayed dead the rest of the video. And, and so commenters are, are just like, did anyone see the sword fight back there? Like,
Christa Innis: well, I love that because actually I think one of my first videos I saw you, he was in the background with the mask because I was like, what’s happening here?
And then looking at the comments and everyone’s like, what’s going on? Um, but that’s like the same with like, get ready with me videos when people are telling a story. People love watching and listening and I feel like there’s some kind of like correspondence with like, I don’t know, maybe some kind of fancy word for like a study of like, people love being able to like see and listen at the same time.
And so if there’s something going on, I feel like it, like it grabs their attention too.
Cliffnotes Gal: So I don’t have ADD or ADHD, but I have hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of comments from people saying that them either seeing. Gurkin catching the ball or seeing my son in the background playing that it helps them focus more.
They all say they have ADD brain. And being able to see Gurkin catching a ball while listening to me actually helps them. And it’s one of the reasons why they can’t listen to the story times is because it’s someone just looking at a camera telling the story for 30 minutes. So when they can get like a small recap of it and there’s also something going on in the background, they’re able to absorb the information better.
Christa Innis: I love that, that makes so much sense. I’m not diagnosed, but I’m pretty sure I’ve got one, one of those. My,
Cliffnotes Gal: I would never be able to watch a dog catching a ball and focus on a story because I would just wanna keep watching the dog. Uh, so I, I can’t understand that, but
Christa Innis: oh, I’m like, I, if there’s two things going on, I’ll like then go back and be like, wait, what did she do with her makeup there?
What would she, with her eyes there? Or, I’ll kind of go back, but like, yeah, I, I think that’s probably why I started doing skits because like I’m like, I need to tell these stories in like an interesting different kind of storytelling way, but yeah, stories nonetheless. Okay, so I know before we get to our main story, I know you said you have a wedding related story that happened at your own wedding.
So do you wanna talk
She Passed Out at Her Own Wedding!
Cliffnotes Gal: Oh, yes. So, uh, this year I will be married 19 years to my husband.
Christa Innis: Awesome.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, he and I got married, yeah. A long time ago, but, so I’m a diabetic and, uh, we got married at the worst time ever in the state of Louisiana. We got married in the summertime in June with an outdoor wedding. Oh my God.
Uh, I don’t recommend to anybody to do that. Uh, I ate well before the wedding to like manage my sugar levels, so that was great. But while we were up there saying our vows, we were holding hands and I looked down at our hands and realized that like our four hands turned into like 20, and I was seeing like quadruple of everything.
Christa Innis: Oh.
Cliffnotes Gal: And so I looked up as my, as our pastor was talking, like marrying us literally. And I looked up at him and I went, I think I’m about to pass out. That was all that I remembered. Oh. So I know what happens because it’s on video. Um, but I did, so I pass out and, um, I remember my maid of honor who is still my absolute best friend today, uh, in the video, it shows her telling someone like, you need, oh, telling my husband, like, you need to, you need to pick her up and walk off with her.
Like, she’s passed out. ’cause he was just frozen, like,
Christa Innis: what happened?
Cliffnotes Gal: And so because like he caught me, like I just, I fell and he caught me and is just holding me. And so my friend Lauren’s like, you need to go with her. Like, get her out of here. And so it’s, it’s all on video. He carries me out and I think brings me to the bridal suite where we were getting married.
And I, and they woke me up somehow, but my sugar level had dropped like. Really, really, really low. That mixed with like the heat and being nervous and all of that. So they got me some food and, uh, all of that. And then, um, everything else was a blur that night. Like I do not remember my first dance with my husband.
Um, I don’t remember. I definitely don’t remember saying my vows. Uh, I do remember signing the actual marriage certificate itself, but I joke with my husband, I’m like, babe, we’re gonna have to renew our vows like at 20 years because I don’t remember saying them to you. And so I would, I would like to remember saying my vows to you, but yeah.
So yeah, we
Christa Innis: hold you over.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. I had the typical like, pass out at your wedding story.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. That’s one I have not heard. I love that you guys have it on video and you’re like, well, let’s watch our video this year.
Cliffnotes Gal: And it’s on VHS. So now I actually, I don’t even own a tape player, so I wouldn’t, I need to, I need to do that little thing where you can have it sent in and turned into like a DVD or something.
Christa Innis: Yeah,
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah, yeah.
Christa Innis: Kids watch it. Um, that’s, oh my gosh, that’s wild. So like, so even after your blood sugar went up, then you were still just kind of like in a daze the rest of the day.
Cliffnotes Gal: Oh yeah. Yeah. And anyone who’s a diabetic would understand, like, you’re just so, it’s like it’s brain fog. And so I, I’m almo like I know I danced, I just don’t remember it.
Um,
Christa Innis: oh my gosh.
Cliffnotes Gal: And I remember sitting down and eating some food at like our table for the wedding party, but, oh, and I do, I remember this as well when we left. So we had a limo bring us to New Orleans because we were gonna fly out the next day to go to Mexico for our honeymoon. Um, and. I had a, like pulsating migraine because again, a diabetic will understand, like when you go extremely low and you have to get your sugar levels back up, you just don’t feel good.
It takes, it takes a while for you to be able to just feel good. And I had this horrible, horrible migraine and so we had the limo get off the interstate and pull into this like shady ass gas station and pulls up. Uh, there were not a lot of lights on at this gas station. My husband gets out in his tucks and goes in and buys like one of the gas station packs of Excedrin Migraine for me, and then comes back into the limo and gives it to me.
And I slept the whole way to New Orleans in the limo.
Christa Innis: Oh.
Cliffnotes Gal: Uh, and then by the time we got to the hotel, I felt better, but yeah, I literally slept the whole way to New Orleans, which is about like a 50 minute drive.
Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. So how was your honeymoon? Where like, did you feel
Cliffnotes Gal: better? It was good. I remember that.
Christa Innis: Oh, good. Okay. Well, there you go.
Cliffnotes Gal: It was good. It was fun. Yeah. It was the typical, like all inclusive. Like we couldn’t afford a lot back, back then. Like we were in very, very different, uh, different lives back then, but we, we did what we could and had so much fun. Yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I love that. I love the all inclusive route.
That just makes it easier too, for planning and budget. We did that too. It was
Cliffnotes Gal: so easy. Yeah. I tell, I tell everyone, I’m like, I wish we would’ve just eloped the amount of money that my mom who raised me as a single mom, uh, that she had to spend. And we tried. We stayed under budget, like extremely under budget, but I still, I was like, to this day, I think back, I’m like, I wish I would’ve just told her.
Don’t even worry about it.
Christa Innis: Aw. I know. I feel like it’s like, I feel like as the older I get too, like people like looking back, like their, your circle kind of gets smaller and you’re also just like, maybe I just like, it’d be easier. ’cause the people too that spend all this money on these big parties, I feel like a lot of times it’s because like families wanna be a part of it or, you know, and then a lot of these stories as you’ll, you might see in this one, but like, then it just creates drama in a lot of these, a lot of these families.
Yeah. And I, I always say like, my husband and I got married in our early thirties, but we’d been together since like our early twenties. And I was like, if we’d gotten married in our twenties, I think it’d been such a way, like we would’ve not had, we would’ve had way less, less money. But I feel like we would’ve tried to have a bigger par, you know, a bigger party.
Yeah. And invite more people. So I feel like we were able to like, okay, these are more important people to us, but older
Cliffnotes Gal: and wiser.
Christa Innis: But I feel like if, again, if it was like 10 more years later, I think it would’ve been even smaller. I think you just kinda like realize like, okay, who’s been around a little bit longer and
Cliffnotes Gal: That’s right.
Christa Innis: Plus there’s been some amazing elopement stories I’ve heard where they go to like Paris or they go to, you know, somewhere cool and they, you spend the same amount or That’s right. Way less for a week trip or whatever.
Cliffnotes Gal: Then have some have like a little party in your backyard when you get back and that’s your reception.
Christa Innis: Yeah, exactly. Lots of, lots of options.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
The Engagement Story: The Family Dynamic Drama
Christa Innis: All right, so we don’t go over time. Let’s get into this week’s, uh, story submission. So these are stories that are sent to me from followers and I’ve not read it. So let’s get into it. Feel free to stop me at any time and we’ll react. Okay, here we go. My sister is a narcissist and honestly, my mother might be too.
To surprise me, my fiance messaged my mother to ask for my ring size and for my dad’s blessing. My mother went out and bought a ring herself and told him that my father was happy for him to move forward. Like a business exchange? No, like I don’t, we don’t want your input. We’ll just buy the ring.
Cliffnotes Gal: Oh, no.
Okay.
Christa Innis: Yikes. Two weeks later, we flew to Luxembourg to visit my parents at their holiday home. On the second day, my fiance asked my mom for the ring, so she knew he planned to propose that day. We told her we were going to the waterfall and would be back later. I had no idea what was coming. The moment he proposed, my mother suddenly showed up with her friends and my father all cheering.
The quiet romantic moment my fiance had planned was completely gone. That evening he told me to get ready for dinner, but before we could leave, my mother stopped us. She had already set up a surprise engagement party with her friends in champagne.
Cliffnotes Gal: Come on, mom.
Christa Innis: Like, why would you not even think to like talk to the fiance?
Cliffnotes Gal: That’s because mom only cares about the way that she looks to her friends.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Oh my gosh. She’s like calling her friends like, just wait. We’re gonna have the best party. Like a full blown argument broke out. But we ended up canceling our dinner plans and attending the party. So now it’s like, not even for you, it’s for your mom.
Right. After the guests left, we started talking about wedding locations. When I mentioned Hawaii, another fight erupted. They said they could never afford it. The night ended badly, and the next day we barely spoke. After two days of silence, we decided to travel with them to Belgium, where I grew up, to share the news with friends.
My brother and sister were happy at first, but within two weeks my sister started trying to seduce my fiance. What is this family? Okay, what?
Cliffnotes Gal: Okay, what’s up with the family now? Now I’m like,
Christa Innis: this is very odd. This is what, this is a
Cliffnotes Gal: real story.
Christa Innis: I tell you. Sometimes I read these stories and I’m like, this cannot be real.
Like,
Cliffnotes Gal: oh my gosh,
Christa Innis: some are just outrageous. But then I’ll post a story or like I’ll share, you know, story time. If people are like, this happened to me, this exact thing happened to me, and I’m like, I don’t think they’re as, I think they’re more common than we think. It’s wild. Um, telling him that she was the better option.
We ended up staying for a month. I’d be out of there a month still after that, a
Cliffnotes Gal: month. Do they not work?
Christa Innis: I, I know they’re doing all this traveling, but then the mom was mad that they wanted Hawaii. Not enough money
Cliffnotes Gal: for Hawaii.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Oh my gosh. Not enough. Because it wasn’t a place she selected as, as a wife, right?
Yes.
Cliffnotes Gal: Right.
Bridal Shop Body-Shaming
Christa Innis: We ended up staying for a month because my mother promised to pay for the wedding dress and booked appointments at bridal shops. I said, I didn’t wanna bring my sister, but I was manipulated into it with the whole, with the whole family as family. Guilt trip. Yikes. At the first stop, at the first shop, the saleswoman told me my body wasn’t made for fitted dresses.
My gosh. After trying on 10 dresses, I hated and hearing nonstop comments from my sister and mother about how I looked fat. Why I would not be including well either of
them.
Cliffnotes Gal: That’s just toxic. You don’t even, they shouldn’t even be in the wedding.
Christa Innis: No. Or
Cliffnotes Gal: at the wedding.
Christa Innis: This is definitely a story where, I mean, I don’t know what happens, but, or it’d be like, let’s just elope.
Right. Where do, where does your family wanna go? Let’s,
Cliffnotes Gal: like, I would hope that the husband is saying like, look babe, let’s just, let’s just go do this thing with just us.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Yeah. The second someone starts making you feel bad, especially when it’s supposed to be like your day trying on dresses, feeling beautiful.
I’d be like, I’m done with this. Like, I’ll go with a friend or go by myself later,
Cliffnotes Gal: a hundred percent.
Christa Innis: Um, they were saying, or I showed too much skin or looked bad. I finally said I wanted to leave at the second shop. I found my dress within minutes and started crying. My father seemed completely unbothered and asked how I planned to pay for it.
I was confused and that’s when my mother said, they don’t have the 690 euro after. Yeah. That’s Euro after all. So they get her excited, say they’re gonna pay for the dress she finds when they’re like, oh, we don’t have the money for it. And I wonder, wow. In 690, I mean, I’m trying to think of like the calculation, but.
That doesn’t seem very expensive for a dress, 690 Euros, because I think it’s like,
Cliffnotes Gal: I don’t know what the conversion rate is right now. Um,
Christa Innis: I feel like it was pretty close, like when I was just in, I was in Spain a couple years ago and
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah, I mean, it seems like the price of like an average. I mean, I think my golly, my wedding dress back then was like $400, $500, something like that.
But man, this is just toxic.
Fiancé to the Rescue
Christa Innis: Yeah. Wild. Um, she says, I ran out of the, outta the shop crying and went to the cafe where my fiance was waiting. I told him everything without hesitation. He marched into the store, bought the dress without seeing it, booked us a hotel and said we’d figure out everything ourselves.
Cliffnotes Gal: Love
Christa Innis: it. Yay.
Cliffnotes Gal: Good husband.
Christa Innis: Good man,
Cliffnotes Gal: good husband.
Christa Innis: Two days later, we returned to my parents’ house and my mother exploded. She was angry that we bought the dress without telling her. Uh, and said it was unfair because they never had a big wedding. So she’s now kept trying to control it because they didn’t have the wedding they wanted or something.
Um, she also claimed my father never gave his blessing. My father agreed with her and said he could never trust anyone with his beloved daughter.
Cliffnotes Gal: Okay.
Christa Innis: A massive fight broke out and we ended up flying home. Once we were home, everyone was, everyone there was happy for us, but my heart was breaking because my own family didn’t accept us.
In January, my mom finally called and said she needed the wedding date and location so she could book time off or they wouldn’t come at all. My father is still refusing, wait, so this is happening right now? She said, my father,
Cliffnotes Gal: I was about to say like, this is now.
Christa Innis: Because sometimes people will like send a story and then they’ll be like, oh, that was 20 years ago.
We’re happily married. Yeah. So I wasn’t sure. But yeah, it says my father is still refusing to walk me down the aisle. If we have a wedding, we, if we have a wedding weekend, that’s the short version of part one. I’ll write a part two when you’re ready.
Cliffnotes Gal: Wait, I wanna know if the wedding happened yet.
Christa Innis: I know. I need to find out.
Cliffnotes Gal: And where are they located? Are they like in the us?
Christa Innis: I’m wondering if they’re in the US and then they traveled. They traveled to Belgium where they bought the dress.
Cliffnotes Gal: Damn. If old girl is like anywhere near me, within driving distance, she needs to invite me to the wedding and I will be there in a heartbeat.
And I’ll make sure her reception is a blast.
Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my gosh. That’d be so fun. We’re like, we’re coming here wedding.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yes. Yeah. I wanna know if it happened. Yeah. You need the part two.
Christa Innis: Yes. I know. I wasn’t expecting it for it to end like that. Um. I feel like, I like the way this is going, in the way that her boundaries have been really good.
Like her boundaries are firm. Her fiance’s backing her up. ’cause I feel like in a lot of these stories, we don’t hear about the fiance or how he’s like supporting his wife, whether it’s a mother-in-law or not. Um, and so I feel like it’s really good that she has him. And so I’m hoping like they stick firm on their boundaries and are either like, if the, and the mom’s calling like, okay, when’s the date?
This is their chance to be like,
Cliffnotes Gal: no,
Christa Innis: you know, we’re not gonna give you the date
Cliffnotes Gal: No.
Christa Innis: And do our own thing.
Cliffnotes Gal: No, this sounds like as much as it sucks like mom and dad, it doesn’t seem like it’s beneficial to have them in your adult life right now.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: Like, it does not seem like there is anything positive that is coming from that relationship.
And if there is not, like, and this is for friendships too, like if it’s not positive and bringing you joy, then why have it?
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: That’s why people write off their parents sometimes.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And anyone that’s like family is family or blood is thicker than water.
Cliffnotes Gal: No,
Christa Innis: I think they’re using that as like a manipulative tactic because mm-hmm.
Obviously they could tell that she’s like, this isn’t right, this isn’t how family should treat me. And so they’re gonna try to manipulate you. And that’s why people stay in like toxic family relationships for so long because they’re like, well, it is family. Okay. Like, but no one deserves to be treated that way.
Especially like when she’s so happy and,
Cliffnotes Gal: yeah. Yeah. I mean, it would be different if they’re like, look, we don’t want you getting married because like this man is horrible for you and does like horrible things, but it’s not sound like that’s the case, or at least we haven’t heard that. Um, I am so glad that he stepped up and did something though.
Because you hear stories. Yeah. Like all the time. But normally it’s like the. Spouse’s parent acts a certain way towards the bride.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: And the spouse never stands up for his bride.
Christa Innis: Yes.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, so this is even more impressive that he’s standing up for her against his own in-laws or future in-laws.
Christa Innis: Yes. No, that’s such a good point.
’cause I would say like 75% of the stories I get where it’s like a bride and her mother-in-law, there’s no mention of the fiance in the story. Agree. So, like, when I like act ’em out as skits, I kind of just like will like, you know, put him in there. And sometimes, sometimes, but when I actually read the story, I’m like, guys, I don’t know where he’s at in this.
Like, it’s no mention like, mother-in-laws will corner the bride and they’ll all these things will happen. Um, and so my advice is to those brides is always, he needs to be the one to Yeah. To talk to the mom and address her. Yeah. Um, so yeah, the fact that he’s like creating a blockade to her own family, I think is really showing a healthy like boundary that they’re setting.
Cliffnotes Gal: Um, I agree
No Peace, No Plate
Christa Innis: agree. Yeah. What, what advice would you give her at this, at this point, about like, mom calling?
Cliffnotes Gal: Well, I don’t, I feel like I have to be limited on the advice to provide because I don’t know the rest of the story. Yeah. If it were me, which it, it’s hard and would take a lot of courage if that was my parents acting that way, I, they wouldn’t be going to the wedding.
Like, yeah, I don’t need that at my wedding at all. And I say this because a family member of mine who her spouse’s family was not super accepting of her, um, because she was not able to have children. Mm-hmm. And his family wanted him to have children of his own. And she already had two children from a prior marriage.
They treated her like absolute crap. And at their wedding. The best man was the groom’s brother, and he was supposed to like do the whole like, I think catch the garter or help take the garter off or whatever it is, like the groom takes the garter off. I don’t know if that’s a southern thing, but Yeah. Um, but the best man is there and then there’s like a dance with the best man.
Well, when the announcement came on for the DJ saying like, Hey, bride and best man, and then groom and maid of honor come out to the dance floor, best man stood her up, didn’t go on the dance floor to dance with her, and then they left. Um, why do you want people like that at your wedding? Now granted she didn’t know this was gonna happen at their wedding.
Like if she would’ve known that, she would’ve said like, I don’t want them coming. But like, that’s what you lead yourself to happen. You have someone toxic like that. If you break down and tell them, Hey, here’s the date they’re going to try and find a way to make that wedding about themselves. Because they’ve not proven otherwise.
So don’t even, don’t even have them there. That’s my advice. They don’t need to be there. They haven’t proven that they’re worthy enough to be there.
Christa Innis: Totally. I think it’s like we wanna continually give chances, especially for family or people we’ve known for a long time. But like the way she started out, the story was saying like, my mom’s a narcissist and I’m pretty sure my sister is too.
Or whatever order it was. Um, you know, you have that gut feeling like, mm-hmm ooh, someone’s gonna wreck my day. And you don’t wanna go into your wedding day. You wanna be go into your wedding day and be like, oh, my favorite people are here. I’m so excited. I’m a princess, or whatever. You know, your vibe is, but like, you know, that gut feeling like just in general of like, if you’re going somewhere where maybe you don’t get along with someone, or there’s drama that like feeling where like something’s gonna happen and you don’t want that on that day.
So I completely agree with you. It’s like you need to be firm with your boundaries now and. Maybe it’s a time to elope and take a fun trip with your fiance. That’s right. Don’t them hanging money over your head.
Cliffnotes Gal: People that use weddings and the attendees as like a business transaction. Oh, well they know my dad because they worked with him 20 years ago, so I need to invite them.
No, you don’t. No, you don’t. If they’re not in your life right now, do they know your date of birth?
Christa Innis: Right.
Cliffnotes Gal: If they don’t know your birthday, they don’t need to be there.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Yes. Oh my gosh, yes. Like I, I feel so lucky that I didn’t have like parents come in and be like, here, here’s my coworkers. I wanna invited to the wedding.
Like they, I was like, you tell me your close friends that you wanted to come to the wedding, that’s totally fine. Um, but I hear stories where it’s literally like. Someone they met as a baby and Right. They’re like, haven’t seen ’em in the last 25 years. And their mom’s like, here invite Susan from 20 years ago.
And they’re like, I have no relationship with them. Mm-hmm. And then they’ll get mad because they’re like, well, why wouldn’t you let me invite my friends? But, um, yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Well, and then the threat comes out, oh, well I’m paying for the wedding, so.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cliffnotes Gal: You need to invite them. I’m paying for it.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Thanks for the threat.
Christa Innis: And that’s where I’m confused with these people too. ’cause it’s like, oh, they say we can’t afford Hawaii. So are they assuming that they’re supposed to pay for it? But now they’re saying they can’t pay for the dress, so they’re, they sound like they’re just gonna try to hold money over your head.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I’m wanna hear
Cliffnotes Gal: part two.
Wedding Confessions & Regrets
Christa Innis: Yeah. I’m gonna reach out to her and see if we can get a part two. All right. Um, I always like to end these with some confessions that people send me on Instagram. So let’s read these. These are, let’s see, what’s a decision you regret not speaking up about? Oh, um, this person says, my in-laws were inviting people behind our backs to our wedding.
They didn’t say anything. I, that’s hard. I, I had a etiquette expert on here a while back and I asked her like, what you do in that situation? And she’s like, it’s hard when someone’s already invited ’cause you don’t know, like, like what they were told and like how to contact them. And so that like adds a whole new layer of like complication.
’cause it’s like if you just show up on the wedding day,
Cliffnotes Gal: right? Like, I mean, again, weddings can happen in a totally different way now, but I’m used to like, you send the card in the mail, they RSVP and send it back. And that’s how you check off how many people are gonna be in attendance because you have to provide those numbers and you get charged per head.
I don’t know if that’s still the same case, but like, yeah. If people being invited behind the scenes and they’re not included in that headcount, don’t you pay more? Per head if they’re not in the original numbers.
Christa Innis: Prob yeah, probably. They’ll probably see it. There’s more people there and, um, yeah, I mean that’s pretty much all the same.
Like sometimes it’s more digital now, but other than that it’s, they’re still counting it the same way. And that tells me that there’s someone that hasn’t hosted an event before or been part of it to know like you can’t have extra people.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Um, this says inviting some people I wanted and went with a smaller venue instead.
Um, the, I’m talking about garter. The whole garter thing. I didn’t want it at all, but I kept getting told it was tradition.
Cliffnotes Gal: Uh huh. Yeah.
Christa Innis: I didn’t do it at my wedding. I was like,
Cliffnotes Gal: shit, that person must be from the south.
Christa Innis: I mean, they most what I feel like they do ’em out here, but like most weddings I’ve been to in recent times, I haven’t seen it.
Um, but I feel like it’s like maybe more, more religious weddings. I don’t know.
Cliffnotes Gal: Where are you at?
Christa Innis: I’m in Wisconsin.
Cliffnotes Gal: Okay. Do y’all do money dances as well? ’cause we do money dances.
Christa Innis: I’ve been to a couple weddings, but it’s not like very common.
Cliffnotes Gal: Okay, alright.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. We do two different types of money dance, either, um, you have like a little sash as the bride and the money is put into the sash or you carry around a boot and Oh.
Money gets put into a boot.
Christa Innis: Okay.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I, yeah, I know there’s so many like, interesting traditions. I think the one time I saw the wedding dance was like maybe going on 10 years ago now. Okay. So yeah, it’s been a while.
Cliffnotes Gal: Hmm. Okay.
Christa Innis: Um, all right, I’ll do two more. Um, letting my dad bring his girlfriend who was his mistress because I feared he wouldn’t come.
He left early anyway. Oh, that’s one of those gut things, right? Like that’s you, you want it to work ’cause you want your dad there, but.
Cliffnotes Gal: But was your, your mom is still married to him, so he,
Christa Innis: that’s where I’m like, I don’t Yeah.
Cliffnotes Gal: Isn’t a mistress. You’re still married and your mistress is like, who you’re cheating on your wife with, right?
Christa Innis: Yeah. Unless she meet. Well, yeah. I’m guessing it could be like they’re now divorced, but that’s the one he cheated on. Which either way that’s awkward if your mom’s there.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. That’s weird.
Christa Innis: I would be like, don’t come.
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah. Yeah.
Christa Innis: Um, let’s see. Not telling my brother to end his relationship earlier, love his ex, but they were not compatible.
Cliffnotes Gal: Okay.
Christa Innis: Because that’s not wedding related, but that’s, that’s just a regret. People are just confessing to me. All right. Well awesome. Well thank you so much for coming on. That was,
Cliffnotes Gal: yes, thank
Christa Innis: you. Glad story. Can you tell everyone where they can find your content, follow you for more, um, cliff notes and um, and learn more about you?
Anything fun you’re working on?
Cliffnotes Gal: Yeah, so you can find me on, um, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, which I don’t post a lot on there, but all of them, the handle is the Cliffnotes gal. And, um, I just ask followers, keep bringing me the stories, tag me in anything that you need shortened, and um, I’ll shorten ’em up for y’all.
Awesome. Well, thanks so much. Thank you!