wedding culture

When your future mother-in-law demands to crash your bachelorette party, you know the drama is just getting started.

That’s just one of the bold wedding hot takes Christa Innis and Suzanne Lambert—a DC-based comedian, writer, and content creator whose sharp wit and strong opinions have earned her a dedicated following—tackle in this episode of Here Comes the Drama.

From setting boundaries with overbearing in-laws to debating dress codes and cash gifts, no topic is off-limits. Suzanne brings her sharp wit to the chaos of wedding culture—why some brides treat their big day like a year-long holiday and the awkward reality of forced wedding party invites.

Plus, they react to jaw-dropping listener confessions, from toxic family members to wedding guests who just don’t get it. If you love wedding chaos, hot takes, and unfiltered humor, this episode is for you! 

Tune in as Christa and Suzanne break down the good, the bad, and the truly outrageous moments from weddings gone wrong.

Episode Chapter Markers

00:00 Introduction 

02:33 Wedding Culture and Boundaries

04:52 Wedding Hot Takes and Dress Codes

11:39 Wedding Drama and Unpopular Opinions

32:20 Victim Mentality and Misunderstandings

34:48 Silent Treatment and Family Dynamics

36:15 Confrontation in the Pantry

47:57 Wedding Dress Shopping Drama

Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments

• The unrealistic expectations placed on brides and why “Bridezilla” is often just a woman setting boundaries.
• Why do some people turn every holiday into an excuse to post their wedding photos?
• The hilarious (and sometimes cringe-worthy) wedding traditions that should be left in the past.
• The great wedding guest dress code debate – should weddings have strict guidelines?
• The audacity of guests demanding freebies and influencers expecting comped wedding services.
• Why is wedding culture often riddled with passive-aggressive family dynamics, and how to handle them?

Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode

• “People have a real problem with women sticking up for themselves.” – Suzanne Lambert
• “The behavior you allow is the behavior that will continue.” – Suzanne Lambert
• “Do you want people to look good and feel good in your photos? Because that’s what’s important, not turning them into your aesthetic props.” – Suzanne Lambert
• “ I feel so bad for these brides because they can’t stand up for themselves and they need someone like that” – Christa Innis

About Suzanne

Suzanne Lambert is a DC-based comedian, writer, and content creator known for her sharp wit and unfiltered takes on everything from politics to pop culture. She started performing comedy in 2018—despite (or rather, because of) an ex-boyfriend who said he’d dump her if she did. Since then, she’s taken the stage at acclaimed venues like the DC Improv, Laughing Skull, Arlington Drafthouse, Side Splitters, and the legendary Friars Club. Suzanne has performed alongside top acts like Mark Normand, Katherine Blanford, and Tony Woods.

Her comedic style blends amused bewilderment with strangely strong opinions on the most unexpected topics. A Georgia native, she carries a Southern charm laced with biting humor and a deep appreciation for the absurdity of modern life. Beyond the stage, she keeps audiences laughing on TikTok (@itssuzannelambert), where her content has been featured in Newsweek and CNN.

Follow Suzanne Lambert:

• Website
• Instagram
• Tiktok

Join the Drama with Christa Innis:

• Website
• Tiktok
• Instagram
• Youtube
• Facebook

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A Team Dklutr Production

Blog Transcript:

Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies

Christa Innis: Hi, Suzanne. Thank you so much for coming on. I’m so excited to talk to you. So, for anyone who doesn’t know, you can just tell us a little bit about you. And at first, I have to say, I love your content. I love how witty and narky. I don’t even know how you would describe it, but you’re so quick-witted.

And when I found you, I was like, this is an instant follow because it brings joy to my feed. I love it. I love that. Yeah. So just tell me a little bit about what you do. And, uh, I thought you’d be perfect for this.

Suzanne’s Journey From Wedding Critic to Viral Comic

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, I’m so pumped to be here. Now I told you, but I started my comedy career really talking about wedding culture.

So, this is such a great fit, but my name is Suzanne Lambert. I’m a comedian, writer, and content creator. A lot of what I create content about is political, but we talk about all kinds of things. We talk about skincare; we talk about makeup. I’m a Georgia girl, and I live in DC, so I definitely have a Southern influence on a lot of my content, but I just really try to make people laugh at the end of the day.

And Have a little bit of fun and talk a little bit of shit. So

Christa Innis: I love that. Yeah. What I’m trying to do here with this podcast is share some crazy hot takes that people have when it comes to weddings and people who aren’t afraid to say what’s on their minds. And I feel like you emulate that pretty well.

And. I feel like you’re that friend that a lot of brides need when it comes to setting boundaries. Because a lot of these stories are crazy, either relatives coming in or a friend that tries to sabotage your wedding. And so I feel so bad for these brides, or it can be a story from a bridesmaid or whoever.

I feel bad for them because they can’t stand up for themselves, and they need someone like that.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, totally. I’ve been in that position before,  and we might get into it later where I’ve had to intervene on behalf of the bride and tell other people in the party or even tell people they’d hire that, ok, we need to do things a little differently because I think a lot of Brides are so afraid of coming off as a bridezilla don’t draw boundaries or stand up for themself when they need to. And then, of course, you see the reverse, where people are just acting all kinds of crazy. So there, Yes. It feels like there is, very often in-bein-between

Christa Innis: Oh yeah. It’s like you can’t win. ’cause even the stories were like I clearly show. 

The bride’s family is maybe like an in-law, or something is being horrible to her, and they’re like, well, She’s a bridezilla because she said no plus ones or no kids,  and it’s like, come on, right?

Suzanne Lambert: People have a real problem with women sticking up for themselves, And I’m like, if this was actually real life and you knew this person and you heard this was going on, there’s no way you would take that other person’s side.

But because they’re a bride. Are they automatically wrong? Like, no.

Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s insane. Like, sometimes my blood boils reading these stories because I’m just like, why do we have such hate towards these women? I read a crazy mother-in-law story yesterday where literally nothing the bride did could be right.

Like she could do anything, and this mother-in-law was terrible to her. And I’m like, why? It’s just that, misogynistic, like, I don’t know. Internal misogyny or something. I don’t know.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah. The boy-mom thing can be really weird. My mother-in-law is an angel. I’m so thankful. I didn’t have to deal with any of that from members of my family, thankfully, but I’ve seen it, , and it’s wildIt’ske absolutely wild.

Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my gosh. Yeah, same here. I can’t relate to that. I’m very sorry for the brides that have to. So I kind of wanna start off talking about some crazy stories and wedding hot takes right off the bat. So you said you used to cover, like talking about the wedding industry, crazy things you’ve seen at weddings.

Is there something that comes to mind where you’re like, this was insane, or just a strong take you have on weddings? 

Wedding Social Media Habits That Make No Sense

Suzanne Lambert: Oh, so many. This is more broadly, like, culture, and it’s just funny, right? I find it hysterical that people will use any excuse to post their wedding photos.

Like, all of a sudden, people are super passionate about it. Arbor Day. They’re like, in honor of Arbor Day, here’s a wedding photo by a tree. I’m like, just say you want to post your wedding photos, but don’t make up these weird holidays that you’ve never observed before in order to post that.

And I do think, to an extent, there is a limit to how many. Posts you get about your wedding before I’m muting you. I’m sorry, and it’s not because I’m not happy for you, and it’s not because you don’t look beautiful. Still, it’s like you deserve to take other photos of yourself that you love. You deserve to think about other things besides your wedding uh And also, this is another one, the countdown blocks, and apologies in advance to anyone who has done this, where it’s counting down the number of days to your wedding, like it’s Times Square on New Year’s Eve.

Yeah. I find those insane. I’m like, are you good? That just feels crazy to me. Especially because usually you have the apps that’ll tell you. How many days your wedding is in and you’re like, Oh my God, cause it’s so stressful. Right. I’ve been there. But the thought of physically rotating a block every day to let you know how many days there are until your wedding.

It couldn’t be me. It just couldn’t be me.

Christa Innis: Yeah. It’s funny because I got those as a gift, but I don’t think I ever displayed them or used them. And I think I ended up re-gifting them because I was like, and sorry if someone’s listening, that gave it to me. I’m sorry.

Suzanne Lambert: I was like, shit. Did someone give those to me?

I hope not. But I didn’t use them if you did.

Christa Innis: Well, yeah, and the thing, too, I feel like that it’s different is, my husband and I had already lived together for years before we got engaged and married. So, to us, it wasn’t, like, countdown till we move in, countdown till, I don’t know, we were already at that point.

So, it was just, for us, it was just, like, another step,

Suzanne Lambert: I guess. Yeah, it’s goofy to me, and to be clear, who cares what I think? If that makes you happy, do it. I do just when people post the pictures of the countdown of the wedding, I’m just, like Oh, we got to get you something else to think about to like, you can’t, that cannot be your sole focus.

Christa Innis: It can’t consume you. When you were talking about Arbor Day and posting a picture, something that I always think about is when someone posts to celebrate someone else in their life, but they use their wedding photo, dude, that’s the first thing when they’re like, happy birthday to my second cousin once removed.

But it’s them as a bride and then in a family photo and arrow. And I’m like, Oh,

Suzanne Lambert: No, the craziest one I’ve ever seen in my life. This younger girl in my sorority, I don’t think she follows me anymore, so she won’t see this. She posted about her maid of honor, so like her best friend, and they have a million photos to choose from.

She posted about her maid of honor on her maid of honor’s birthday, and the picture she chose. Oops. Was her, the bride, like, facing the camera, you know, beautiful. Her maid of honor crouched down on her hands and knees. You literally couldn’t see her face because she was fixing it.

The bride’s veil. No, and I call those I happy day posts, it’s like you made their birthday about your wedding and it’s hard because I and my best friends are so bad About taking photos legitimately I was with them this past weekend and I said if we don’t get a photo this weekend We have to text our exes and we get to pick which of our exes we have to text That’s how dire it is.

We do not take photos. So I understand sometimes there’s not a lot to choose from but what I did is I picked a solo picture of some of my bridesmaids and my bridesmaid I had bridesmen after my wedding and I posted that because yeah, I was at my wedding, but it was only them looking beautiful like I was nowhere in the photo because it’s a wild thing to do,

Christa Innis: right?

Yeah, you’re like professional photos. You don’t always get your friends. especially it’s like the sabotage photo It’s like when you go out with friends and you pick the ones where they all look bad, but you look really good, Right?

Suzanne Lambert: Come on. And it’s like maybe if you post one from your wedding and one from theirs side by side To me, that seems fine.

But if it’s just a few, that’s just like a wild thing to do. I could not be me. Yeah. It’s like you’re literally looking the most beautiful you’ll ever look in your life. And they’re also there.

Christa Innis: And they’re awesome. Yes. Oh man, I love that. okay. So kind of talking about wedding hot takes, here are just a couple of different prompts.

I want to get your opinion on it. Do you think weddings should have dress codes or should guests be free to wear whatever makes them comfortable?

Wedding Rules No One Talks About But Everyone Argues Over

Suzanne Lambert: Definitely a dress code. I think anywhere you can provide clarity as someone planning a wedding is crucial to a good guest experience. I didn’t go as far as to make a Pinterest board.

That felt like a little much to me. But I wrote down a dress code and then examples of what that would be for the rehearsal. even for our engagement party. We did that because I think otherwise they’re just going to text you and ask you. And it’s going to be really irritating and you’re going to have a million other things.

This is a hot take on top of that. I think black tie optional is a really tricky dress code. I understand that people don’t want to force people to wear a tux or whatever. But then you have girls. Well, do I wear a long dress? Do I wear a short dress? And I’ve been in that situation So I think wherever you can provide clarity it will always lead to a better experience for the guests and for yourself

Christa Innis: Yes, I know.

I’m always like that. person that’s like searching the website, like, what’s the theme? Because as soon as you get to a wedding and you’re like, oh, I didn’t realize it was going to be outdoor. I was going to be in a barn. Do you want to kind of dress the theme? Yes. Yeah. someone that gave too much detail probably, but I was like, I want people to know what to expect.

Suzanne Lambert: No, me too, and I guarantee you people still asked you, didn’t they? Yeah. Yeah, like, what’s the dress code? And you’re like, did you happen to see the FAQs that I painstakingly put together for this very purpose?

Christa Innis: Right, I also am someone that, like, yeah, I don’t come in a white, Fall gown or something to my wedding, but other than that, I’m like, what a weird thing to say.

Yeah, that seems kind of crazy of  Hot take. That’s a bridezilla behavior. Right? But I’m like, if someone wanted to wear a bright red dress, I don’t care about that stuff. Like, they could have worn white to my bachelorette party and I would have been like, you look great.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, it’s okay if your dress code is casual.

Like, that’s completely fine. If that’s your vibe, cool. Do what makes you feel good. But just let people know. Because being overdressed is a bummer. Being underdressed is a bummer. So just when people know what to expect, I think that’s always the best policy. Actually, I’ll let you keep going because I have so many hot takes that are coming to my head, but I’ll love it.

I’ll react to some more of yours. I love,

Christa Innis: I love that. So this is your opinion on cash-only gifts or explicitly asking for money instead of traditional presence, people are so contrary, like not controversial people I’ve noticed. Yeah,  

Suzanne Lambert: I have seen no issue with that, If that’s what you want, I want to get you something you want. And honestly, I am not the best gift giver. I’m a gift card girl. Like I love giving people a gift card. I love receiving a gift card. So if you’re telling me all you want is cash, cool. To me, that’s great. I see nothing wrong with that, especially because a lot of people.

They’re trying to buy houses or pay off student loans, in the next lifetime. That would be nice. So I get just asking for money and we have plenty of knickknacks already.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I don’t get why some people get so, why don’t people like it? It’s so weird. Like, whenever I go to a wedding, I only bring cash.

Like I’m not going to bring in a big wrapped gift there, you know, showers are different. But, I was sharing about things like the honey fund or like Zola or not, people can just donate cash gifts or donate to your honeymoon or different things. And people were getting, in the comments, a certain generation, not a group, but they were like, I’m not paying for a honeymoon, and you’re not paying for a honeymoon.

If you gave someone 200 at their wedding, they could use it for Dishes, they could use it for sheets or they could go on a vacation, you know, why

Suzanne Lambert: no, don’t you like the person whose wedding you’re going to like, why wouldn’t you want to contribute towards their honeymoon? That’s so strange.

Christa Innis: I mean, you could buy them, whatever, and they could go return it and get cash for it.

So why does it matter what they end up using it for is my thing. I’m like, yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, just for the sake of tradition. And you know what, if you want to buy them a little knick-knack like we had a few people buy us things off the registry. I didn’t care. Like, whatever. If you saw something and it made you think of me and you thought I would like it and you brought it to me.

That doesn’t bother me. I’m appreciative to get a gift either way But if you want to get them something physical you always could do that if that really mattered to you for some reason That’s beyond my understanding

Christa Innis: I know I don’t get upset about things like that

Suzanne Lambert: And again, I don’t know who has done this. I don’t even know if you have done this. Um, I think the wedding color code is bananas. When you are putting out Pantone codes on your wedding invitation, so people wear corresponding shades of lavender and blue, what’s happening? What, what’s going on?

I’ve seen people do it where they ask people to wear all black. That makes a little more sense to me. But I still just can’t get behind stripping people of their individuality. So that they are matching the aesthetic of a wedding. Yes. I think that’s crazy.

Christa Innis: I know, I honestly didn’t know that was a thing when I started making this wedding content.

And I would see it, like, come up in my feed or something and I was like, wait, people actually do this? Do they want their photos to look a certain way? I’m like, that’s over the top. Yeah. Like, sorry guys, you can’t wear that bright pink, but you can wear this dim pink that’s a little dusty and a little, I’m like.

No, too much.

Suzanne Lambert: Right, we require people to wear uniforms? And people don’t like how they look in that color. And not everyone’s color season is the same. Not everyone should be wearing a muted cool tone, right? that’s not, do you want people to look good and feel good in your photos?

That’s what was important to me. I let my Full bridal party be like picking your tuxes and picking your dresses. I gave them a few very reasonable parameters but I want you guys to look hot and I want you to feel hot and have fun because I’ve been to weddings where There’s one where I legitimately looked like I was a middle-aged pioneer woman.

It was so And that was the bride’s goal, by the way, like she did not want us to look good. She was kind of open about that, which I guess I can appreciate to a certain extent. But I looked so bad, and it affects your ability to have fun because you just don’t feel cute, Yeah. That was that hot take.

Whenever you mentioned dress codes, I was like, I gotta bring up the color palette.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I like how, You see more and more weddings now allowing individuality between their bridesmaids. I basically had a website and was able to pick any dress from this website. I had a nice family of colors.

 always in the same family. but I was like pick a style that’s good for your body type or that you feel more comfortable in. Yeah. Because I’ve seen weddings where they have everyone in the same Superfitted dress and it doesn’t matter what size you are. Sometimes you just don’t want a super fitted dress.

No, I’m not a body

Suzanne Lambert: You will not see me in a bodycon. Like it just isn’t for me Yeah, it’s like you want people to feel good what they’re wearing

Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s uh, my parameters were

Suzanne Lambert: like no super plunging necklines because I had one and then no super high slits also because I didn’t have a super high slit, but I had a slit

 and no strapless mostly because it was December and I just didn’t want strapless dresses. like, it was very easy for people to pick something they would actually like.

Christa Innis: Yes. And it’s totally normal to have some guidelines for your wedding party.

Yeah. They are going to be in most of the photos and everything, but to have your guests between some parameters is.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah. It’s bananas. And to me, it sets a negative vibe for the wedding: you’re micromanaging what the guests are going to be wearing. and I’ve never been invited to such a wedding.

My friends would never ever do something like that,

Christa Innis: but

Suzanne Lambert: I feel like it would make me feel like I was on high alert.

Christa Innis: You

Suzanne Lambert: know, unsettled kind of,

Christa Innis: Like, Oh, I’m gonna take my hair down. Wait, am I allowed to wear my hair down? Yeah. Am I, are these earrings okay?

Suzanne Lambert: Like literally, yeah. and it was so funny and you see that creep into even like.

guests, almost like paranoia. So everyone in my wedding wore black. someone came up to me at the wedding. So sweet. They were like, I’m so sorry. I had no idea your bridesmaids were wearing black. I wouldn’t have worn black. I was like, Oh no, no, no, no. It’s so okay. I cannot believe you feel like you have to think about that, but it’s all good.

It’s the most common. I feel like it’s made people a little skittish.

Christa Innis: Oh yeah, for sure. I showed up to a wedding once wearing the exact same colors of bridesmaids and it was like a cranberry Merlot colored dress. I was mortified.I didn’t say anything, but I was like, Oh my gosh.

but it was like a January wedding. So it’s very normal for that time of year. So I was like. No one said anything. Yeah, like you would

Suzanne Lambert: have no way of knowing. I know people are trying to be polite because you see people who do care about the color palette.

But people were texting me asking me, What color the bridesmaids were wearing so that they didn’t accidentally match them, and I’m just like ah Like it doesn’t it matter like I don’t care, but I know Other people do but it just leads to like more annoying messages to have to respond to for the bride You know because there’s been this weird tenseness, I don’t know if that’s a word, created around wedding

Christa Innis: culture these days.

Totally. Yeah. It’s such a spectrum. It’s insane. okay. So this next part is. Pick a side. So the wedding drama debate. So people are sending me their unpopular opinions. So let me know what you think about these. Um, this first one says just because your family is invited doesn’t mean you’re invited.  

Suzanne Lambert: Hell yeah.

Completely agree. especially if you are paying for the wedding yourself. Um, I do think if you’re getting financial assistance from your family for your wedding, do think they have some say, um, but it’s like a second cousin, um, Twice removed. I absolutely don’t think that they need to be invited.

And I also think I would rather not get financial assistance from my family and pick who I wanted to be there than invite a bunch of random people who I don’t actually want to be there. And my husband and I did pay for our own wedding. So we were able to choose. Exactly who we wanted to be there and it made the experience so much better.

But yeah, I completely agree with that.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I feel like this is a common thing where if someone wants to pay and there’s strings attached, then it’s just not worth it. We had some assistance from both parents, but we paid for a good portion. And we had some

Suzanne Lambert: to clarify.

I definitely had some and my in-laws paid for the rehearsal dinner and my parents paid for my dress, and again, any contribution they made. Right. Lookout is very generous. So I just did want to clarify that. I guess my mom hears this. She’s like, wait a second. You’re like, hold up. Yeah. Yeah. But go ahead.

Christa Innis: Yeah. No, but I was going to just say like, but because I have a respectful relationship with both my in-laws and my parents, I reached out and I was like, hey, send me your list of who you want. but I see these stories where it’s like they have a terrible relationship with the in-laws and they’re like, well, we’re paying for this.

You need to invite all these people. And it’s like, that’s not how it works.

Suzanne Lambert: No. You need to be

Christa Innis: respectful both ways, I think.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, it’s tough because if they’re giving you financial assistance, I do think they deserve some say, but that’s just a crappy attitude to have, that you would give someone money with strings attached if it’s someone where not only is there not a relationship, but if, there’s a bad relationship, I think you should prioritize the people you love most in your life.

And I think family is who you make it. So it doesn’t need to be someone related to you by blood. And just because you were invited to theirs. It doesn’t mean it needs to be reciprocal either. So

Christa Innis: 100%. Okay. And this next one says, if I have to travel far for a wedding, I won’t be giving you an expensive gift.

Suzanne Lambert: That’s fine. Yeah. Yeah. I think Don’t go into debt for my wedding. Like please don’t be having debt collectors knocking on your door so that you can come to my wedding and give me a gift. Then you’re also gonna have a grudge against me that I Don’t even know about.

 the bride and groom are not keeping a mental tally in their head of, oh, well, they gave me a gift and they didn’t. And if they are, that’s weird. Then they’re buying you for a dollar amount. Yeah, yeah, a hundred percent. And I’ve heard, you should cover your plate, whatever.

I don’t agree with that. Either. I think people should give what they can afford and what they want to give.

Christa Innis: I think there’s totally different levels to it. But, yeah, for my own wedding, anyone that was flying in, I was like, I don’t want them to give me a gift. I don’t expect it because they’re paying for a flight.

They’re paying for a hotel. all on my dad’s side, they all had a fly in, so they’re paying a lot of money. And so I’m like, I don’t expect any extra gift from you guys. No.

Suzanne Lambert: agree. And everyone had to fly for mine too. Well, almost everyone. I think there were like four people who didn’t have to.

And also, for the rehearsal and the welcome party and of course the wedding, we paid for all the food, all the alcohol, transportation. So once people stepped foot into our wedding weekend, they weren’t spending any additional money. And that was really important to us is like, yeah, we’re not trying to put people.

Because I remember being in my early 20s, going to four weddings a year because I’m from Georgia and you get married as soon as you graduate college, essentially. so I remember being in that situation and I was like, we’re not going to do that to people who are coming to our wedding.

 That’s also why we had a longer engagement so that we could save longer and provide that experience.

Christa Innis: yeah, definitely. I think someone where before I go to a wedding, I know what I’m going to give. I’ve heard of crazy stories where like, they go and they see what the wedding’s like first and someone literally just told me this story a few months ago, or a friend of theirs at a wedding was like, Based on what they got for appetizer and like the setting, that’s what they gave back.

And I was like, no, that’s so

Suzanne Lambert: funny. They’re like, well, it was French onion soup. If it had been lobster bisque, I would have given you an extra. this doesn’t get that much love from me. That’s such a funny thing.

Christa Innis: It’s so odd what people think about. I’m like, how close am I to this person? And spreadsheet at dinner like, okay, this is

Suzanne Lambert: worth this

Christa Innis: amount.

This is

Suzanne Lambert: That’s wild. Yeah, like

Christa Innis: It’s crazy.See what you can afford if you’re close to the person who does that. I don’t know. Yeah,

Suzanne Lambert: I did not invite a wedding to get gifts and, or I didn’t have a wedding to get gifts and money, right? If I wanted money, I wouldn’t have had a wedding.

I would have just saved the money I spent. Yes.

Christa Innis: I have such a problem when it feels like you are just a number at a wedding. Yeah. And you’re only invited to be there. So like, In my early twenties, I felt like I was such a people pleaser. if I got invited to a wedding, I was like, we have to go or like a bridal shower, but then I was like, I got a little bit older, I was like.

Barely friends with this person. Why would I go to their bridal shower and they told me there for a gift. It was just kind of weird. Yeah. So I was like, no, I’m only gonna go to someone’s that I would want at mine. Or we have a good relationship. Totally. Completely agree. All right, let’s jump into today’s or this week’s crazy story.

Mother-in-Law Never Heard of Boundaries and It Shows

So these are blind reactions. I don’t read them ahead of time. And so we’re just going to react together. So feel free to stop me or interrupt me at any time. I’ll pause too. and we’ll see what happens. Perfect. Okay. My fiance and I got engaged in April and have been so excited about planning our wedding for next September. Before we even got engaged, his mother had been supportive, often teasing my fiance about proposing because his grandmother said it on her deathbed.

Love, love, love that

Suzanne Lambert: ally in grandma. She’s like, I got you girl. Yeah, she’s like, one last thing. Yeah. Iconic.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Anyways, she was very excited in general. So when we did get engaged, we called her from Ireland to tell her that he had proposed. In the same breath as saying congratulations, she couldn’t even finish her sentence before asking, can I go dress shopping with you?

I only have two sons. Okay. At the same time, I thought it was innocent excitement coming through. Looking back, I should have known where it might lead. Even when we were leaving that trip engaged for only two days, we told her that we had tentatively picked a city. We actually had already chosen the venue, but we didn’t want to share it yet due to her tendency to voice strong opinions.

Uh Huh, , . Yeah. So they kind of knew it was coming. Sure. She immediately started complaining to family members about the location. We chose, oh, here we go. Months passed. And by June, Father’s Day weekend, we had both sides of the family over. My parents, his grandpa, his mother. His aunt from his mom’s side during dinner.

His mom starts asking me for the address to the venue. I asked why? First of all,

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, Google Maps exists. If she already knew the venue at this point,

Christa Innis: right? just look, I feel like it’s just to make a. Point being like,

Suzanne Lambert: tell me that she drags. My family, Irish Catholic, like it’s, passive aggression is our second language.

That’s exactly what she’s Same here. She wants to say something, but she’s not gonna say it, so she’s gonna ask you a weird question that she could easily, like, look up the

Christa Innis: information herself. Yes. Oh my gosh, the passive regression. Yes. Um, I asked why because I’d already sent the information when we finalized the venue.

Right. There we go. She said she deleted her texts and didn’t have it anymore. Who deletes

Suzanne Lambert: their texts? Like First of all, not, not a mother of that specific age group. They’re not deleting their texts. Second of all, you remember where it is? Like, are you in the CIA? Why are you deleting all your messages?

Not sketchy. Weird. That alone is, yeah.

Christa Innis: Yeah. She wanted to visit the venue. I explained it’s a private property, not open for tours, and even my fiance and I hadn’t seen it in person yet. Instead of understanding, she doubled down. Just send me the address. It’s fine.

Suzanne Lambert: No, it’s actually not. It’s not fine, actually.

Christa Innis: I don’t get the, like, aggressive, like, she went from passive to, like, now she’s aggressive. I don’t get that aggressive, like, I’m telling you what’s happening here.

Suzanne Lambert: Right. Like, whose wedding is this? And all that that’s going to do for most rational people, it just makes me not want to give you what you want, even if I would have been inclined to do it before.

Now I’m definitely not going to like it. I’ll actively go out of my way to make sure you never get that. I’d like to censor it from all of your maps apps. Like that’s how petty I am

Christa Innis: Yeah, the day of the wedding you’ll have a car just pick you up and you’ll be black

Suzanne Lambert: Like actually though. Oh, wow. I cannot. I’m so excited to see where this goes.

Christa Innis: It’s insane. Um instead of uh, I lost my place. Okay. Um, okay. She um Yeah. So she kept pressing until the entire room was visibly uncomfortable. When I said no, she started making excuses like, well, how am I supposed to know where to book hotels? We were 15 months out from the wedding, and I had already planned to arrange a room block closer to the date.

I assured her everything was nearby, but she continued to repeat, just send me the address. I’ll drive by. Okay. Fiance

Suzanne Lambert: needs to intervene. I’ll say that. Yeah. Where, like, where is he? Step in. Yeah. Where’s he at in the mix? He needs to step in and be like, hey mom, you’re doing that thing again. Knock it off.

Christa Innis: It’s the, it’s time. I know you’re a boy mom. Like, let’s. Right. And at

Suzanne Lambert: first I thought I was on the mom’s side because she asked if she could go dress shopping. I only have two sons. I’m like a girl. I want a daughter so bad. If, and when we have kids. So like. I understand that being top of mind, and I’m like, okay, yeah, I get it.

But this is not going the way that I thought it was gonna go.

Christa Innis: Yeah, it turned so quickly.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Um, each time I said no, she came back with, I might go in, or I’ll just pop by. She then pivoted to my bachelorette party, nudging my mom and saying, Aren’t you so happy we’re going on our bachelorette? Oh, no. We? We

Suzanne Lambert: speak French now?

Why, who’s we? No, that’s not. What world is she living in? And do you know, like the kind of things you talk about at bachelorette parties and like often the activities and like paraphernalia that you’re wearing? Like I went to one, my best friend married my brother and like, you know, it’s bad enough sometimes kind of hearing about, you know, your brother and his.

And now wife’s, you know, sex life, like those are the things you talk about at bachelorette parties. Do you want to be hearing that about your son? It concerns me that you might. From what I’m hearing, I

Christa Innis: Maybe. I feel like some mothers like this don’t care and they like to be involved in that. But like this is even the weirdest story.

Like I’ve heard so many where you’re just like, Boundaries. Like Are you into your son? Like that’s, that’s what I’m getting.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Um, Yeah, it’s so, I don’t know, it’s, it’s so weird. Um, at, I was confused and said, oh no. At this point, I was so uncomfortable from the conversation earlier that I firmly told him it wasn’t happening.

Oh no, that’s

Suzanne Lambert: So funny. Oh no. Oh no. That’s hilarious. That’s the best thing she could have said at that moment. I’m really proud of her. Yeah.

Christa Innis: She brushed it off by saying, It’s fine, we’ll do our own thing. My mom, knowing my plans to take a trip with friends, fully supported me. Like, what? Yeah, you’ll do

Suzanne Lambert: your own thing called, You’re not coming, babe.

Yeah. You’ll do your own thing called, You’re gonna go to Bridge and Bunko and hang out at your house like you would’ve been doing cause you’re not a part of this. Yeah. What? What’s happening?

Christa Innis: Oh my god, Bunko, I’ve not heard that name, that word, in so long.

Suzanne Lambert: That came out of the far archives of my brain.

Never have I once played a game of Bunko, but I feel like that’s still very much in the scene.

Christa Innis: Yeah. The day dragged on with her pushing topics like the China set from her deceased aunt and other things. That’s the whole story. Okay, I’ll

Suzanne Lambert: hear more about China. I’m like, I’m listening. What’s going on with that?

I’ll take some antique China. I’m not mad at the hat to be clear.

Christa Innis: Um, at one point, she had a bit to drink. She cornered me in the kitchen, completely unaware of how annoyed I was. She said, Is this my

Suzanne Lambert: ex boyfriend’s mom? Cause I actually was thinking, I wonder if she’s drinking. Um, and then when you said that, I’m like, Who wrote this?

Is this

Christa Innis: my ex’s

Suzanne Lambert: mother? Oh no. It all sounds very familiar. Well, I’m glad it’s an ex. You and I, you and I both.

I think my lucky stars every day, trust me,

Christa Innis: Oh God, I’m dead. Okay. Um, so she called me in the kitchen and she said, aren’t you just so happy I’m going to be your mother in law and not insert difficult family members here. So she’s blocking the name out. I looked her in the eyes and said, um, I don’t know if this is the person’s real name, so

I’m trying to think of, like, a crazy name. Um, Barb. Barb, I’m okay right now. But if you keep pestering me about things, I’m going to the venue. I’m not going to be okay. I added, this is my boundary. She didn’t seem to register at the time. But, oh, did she later.

Suzanne Lambert: Okay, Therapy. I love that. Yeah, we love boundaries.

I would love it if the fiancé was setting some. Um, and I’m annoyed on her behalf that she’s having to do it all herself. But I’m very proud of her for saying that. That’s not easy to say. Bye bye. Yeah.

Christa Innis: Especially when you’re being cornered because it sounds like she’s alone with this mother. Like why is no one around?

And that’s what they

Suzanne Lambert: do. I feel like people like this, like they want to get you alone at your most vulnerable, where you don’t have a chance to really, really think things through. So that’s impressive thinking on your feet.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Yeah. I would be shaking in my boots. I’d be like, is this actually happening right now?

I’m that person that in a scenario, I’m like, Why is this happening? And then like a minute later, I’m like, why didn’t I say that? I should have said that. Or as I’m saying it, I’m like, you know what? And boundaries that I’m like, shaking. And I’m like, that’s okay. I’m like,

Suzanne Lambert: Ooh, maybe we shouldn’t have gone that hard.

Maybe we take a deep breath. My yoga instructors, like generator response, feel powerful choosing. And I’m like, generator response, you feel powerful choosing when I like to spout off. So we all, we all have our struggles. Yeah. I probably would have been like, Yeah, I don’t know, crazy family members sounding pretty good right about now, and like, it would have started a whole thing, so.

Christa Innis: Yeah, um, my, okay. My fiancé and I discussed how upset we were with the day, okay, so now, now he’s around, um, and how comfortable she had made things. He was very supportive and felt the same way. Two days later, can you hear that when my earphones buzz?

Suzanne Lambert: No, uh, I only could when you did that, and it did cut out for like just a second, but we’re back, it looks like.

Oh,

Christa Innis: weird. Maybe it’s my headphones just dying. Okay. Anywho. Um, he was very supportive and felt the same way two days later, he called her to address it, telling her that her behavior was unfair and made everyone uncomfortable. She exploded saying, is this why I’m going to change her name again? Is this why Kelly doesn’t like me?

And hung up. She then gave us science by right. Like, yeah, the girl that wrote the story. Yeah. Okay. Like, huh? What, what gave it away? Like, are you

Suzanne Lambert: acting? Like, so there’s a level of awareness. Like, it’s so funny because my mother in law’s like this. they get there, right? They get, oh, Kelly doesn’t like me, but they don’t see any of the lead up to anything they could have done.

They look at it as a spontaneous event.

Christa Innis: Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: It’s like, oh, all of a sudden, and all of a sudden she didn’t like me. And it’s like, are you forgetting the a hundred things you did before she reacted the one time

Christa Innis: or, or the time that they finally like to snap back. It’s they’re so mean. I don’t do anything wrong.

And it’s like, that was like the story I read yesterday. I’m like, Oh my god, this victim mentality of like, why would she say that to me? I’m just your mom. I just care so much. It’s like, no, that was not the full story. No,

Suzanne Lambert: because if you cared, you, you would be like, oh my god, I hurt your feelings. I’m so sorry about that.

Like that’s a normal way to do it. Can you imagine if someone called you and was like, Hey, at our engagement party, you made us feel bad and sad and whatever, like you would be horrified because you’re a normal person. Imagine like. Like, that’s why they don’t like me?

Christa Innis: Oh my god. Like, what?

Suzanne Lambert: I don’t understand.

And, like, if she had been like, oh, that’s why she doesn’t like me, that would be like such a different thing. Like, oh, okay. I didn’t realize how annoying I was being noted. You know? Won’t do it again. Yeah. Like, sometimes you need a little kick in the ass to be like, oh, I’m acting weird. Yeah. But that’s wild.

And then to hang up, I don’t believe in hanging up the phone, especially on your own son. Right. Right.

Christa Innis: Like, yeah. Um, oh, this is, hold on tight. This is a, this is a long one. I love this. Sorry, Nellie, but I’m living for this. This is crazy. Okay. She then gave us a silent treatment for three weeks. I bet it was a really nice three weeks.

Suzanne Lambert: That sounds lovely. That sounds like a vacation. Yeah. Silent treatment. That sounds ideal. She should do that more often and with others in her life. I would, I would imagine. That is beautiful.

Christa Innis: Best case scenario. I feel like in these scenarios, just keep it going, please. She even ignored my fiance’s birthday, which is two weeks after the incident.

Normally they talk every other day. So this was very shocking until then we had no issues. And I thought our relationship was fine. Her behavior was hurtful, especially to my fiance. Thankfully his aunt who witnessed everything supported us agreeing that his mom’s actions were out of line.

Suzanne Lambert: We had a wonder if the aunt is on the dad’s side or the mom’s side, cause that also kind of changes things a little bit.

It’s her sister. Hopefully the aunt is going to be like, You’re being nuts. If it’s the dad’s sister, she’s like, Oh, I’ve seen this from the beginning. One of us wanted him to end up with her. Like, we all wanted him to end up with the other girl, you know, like, that dynamic is interesting, too.

Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. Like earlier at the party, I think she said it was her. I think she said the mom’s sister or the mom’s side. 

Suzanne Lambert: That’s like worse, honestly. Yeah. You know? Like, your own sister being like, yeah, but again, I hope that that, I hope the aunt is going to the mom. Like, if I saw my sister acting that way, or if they saw me acting that way, they would be the first to be like, hey, cut it out.

Christa Innis: Exactly. I’m going to take these off saying they’re dying already.

We had a 4th of July weekend. Okay. We had a 4th of July weekend planned at his family’s lake house, and she was supposed to join us.

She didn’t show up until the weekend was nearly over. When she arrived, there was no warm embrace, no belated birthday wishes for her son, just coldness. It’s like, why even come? It was incredible. Yeah. Awkward.

Suzanne Lambert: Cause she wants to have her Real Housewives moment. She thinks she’s on like Real Housewives of Orange County, like with a dramatic show up.

Girl, no one was worried. Yeah. No one was worried. They were like praying you didn’t come. Yeah, like, again, like, the silent treatment, the weekend without you, where we’re just like, chillin eating hot dogs, like, waving flags, like, it was all going really, the vibes were high, like, yes.

Christa Innis: Yeah, she likes, yeah, she wanted to come in with the sad music, everyone’s like, oh no, what’s, what’s wrong with Barb over there?

A fur coat.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah, like, mope dramatically around the house. Puffin and puffin Like, what we would do when we were sleeping. Seven and like our parents made chicken for dinner and we didn’t want chicken like that. She wanted spaghetti. She didn’t want chicken. So now she’s making it everyone’s problem.

Yeah.

Christa Innis: Oh my god. So true my fiance I decided we needed to address this. He pulled her aside in the pantry while I stayed around the corner I love, like, the sour cream and onion chips

Suzanne Lambert: listening in,

Christa Innis: you know? That seemed like the best

Suzanne Lambert: spot.

Christa Innis: Funny

Suzanne Lambert: setting for this conversation. I love that she added that in.

Christa Innis: Yeah, the pantry,

Suzanne Lambert: It really sets the scene. It’s like, this is dire. This is a dire situation.

Christa Innis: That was the quickest spot. He started by saying we wanted to resolve things, but she exploded again. She accused us of keeping the wedding a secret because we wouldn’t share the venue address. A narrative she created.

She claimed I had promised to send it to her and didn’t, saying she didn’t do shit. At that point, I stepped in the conversation and said, Well, it’s my turn to enter now! She is like, What?

Suzanne Lambert: Wait, the bride said that? The bride. She’s like, well, it’s my turn to enter now. Step through, step in, push those bagels aside, tell her how you feel, you know,

Christa Innis: I love this.

This isn’t like, I’m, we were just talking about how so many of these stories, like I feel like the bride is a people pleaser and just like, you know, tells a story and I feel so heartbroken for her. Yeah. This is like the first where I’m like, oh my gosh, yeah, she’s coming, she’s

Suzanne Lambert: ready to go. And it’s like the behavior you allow is the behavior that will continue.

And if I had to guess, cause I’ve seen this. a million times. The vibe growing up was like a super passive aggressive where the son probably just learned it was easier to just, you know, not react and let it go and ignore it. But like, it comes to a head in adulthood and especially during weddings. So I’m glad that she’s telling her.

What’s what?

Christa Innis: Yeah,

Suzanne Lambert: they’re

Christa Innis: very proud. Yeah, this is a big moment. Um, she stormed toward me, got inches from my face. How big is this pantry?

Suzanne Lambert: I’m like

Christa Innis: thinking

Suzanne Lambert: this like, I’m still, I’m like thinking about the pantry. I’m like, wow. Pantry envy. There’s like three people in there at this point. Storming.

I’m like, dang. Whose house was this? A rental? Like, I want to, I want to come check out this, this dramatic pantry. Yes.

Christa Innis: Um, she pointed a finger at me and screamed, how dare you talk to me that way? How dare you mention boundaries and make me out to be some kind of villain? Well, you said it. Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: I mean, if you’re feeling it, I’ve been boundaries.

That’s She’s like, no, no, no, no, we don’t do those in my family. We don’t talk about that. You’re gonna learn.

Christa Innis: Yeah. You do what I say in this family. Yeah,

Suzanne Lambert: like, clearly, like, the very, like, the power dynamic between, like, parent and child is very important to her. Because when you’re saying things like that, you feel like she should be Obeying.

Christa Innis: Yes. Oh, yeah. I calmly asked, Are you really going to approach the conversation like this? She responded. Yep. I’m so mad. You have no idea what this has done to me. Oh, my God. Here we go. Okay. She said she would never have spoken to her future mother in law that way, in the way that I spoke to her. She claimed we were leaving her out of the wedding, which wasn’t true, and insisted that she was just teasing me.

Suzanne Lambert: What? Oh, they love to say things like that. Oh, it’s just a joke. Well, it wasn’t funny.

Christa Innis: Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: So what kind of money

Christa Innis: Just giving it to me is teasing her. And like, no, it no, it wasn’t. That’s not what teasing is. It’s only teasing until like You’re told like, that’s not okay, and then it’s like, oh, or no, it’s only, it’s not teasing until you’re told it’s not okay, and then you’re like, oh no, it was just a joke.

And if it

Suzanne Lambert: was just, and if it actually truly were just a joke, and someone’s like, like, I’ll, I’ll make jokes, you know, cause I, I like to kind of test the limits with the people around me and see how jokes will play out. I made a joke the other day, my husband did not appreciate it, and he was like, That’s not funny.

I’ll actually say it really quick. It was kind of funny. I was like, yeah, you know, I always said I was just gonna marry for money and I married for love. Like that was, that was dumb, right? Like laughing. And he’s like, yeah, sorry, you didn’t marry for money. And I was like, well, it’s not too late. And he was like, don’t do that.

And I was like, okay, okay, fair. Like, sorry. You’re right. Noted. Writing that one down. So if you actually are joking and someone doesn’t like it, it won’t offend you to say sorry, wasn’t a good joke, we’ll table that one for never, you know.

Christa Innis: Right, you don’t keep pushing and keep going and When it clearly was not a joke.

I don’t know why it keeps doing that to my face. I like

Suzanne Lambert: It’s dramatic. I know, it’s like,

Christa Innis: whoa!

Suzanne Lambert: To see like the clothes. I love it, I’m imagining cameras in the pantry. Like, I, it’s spitting. It’s a whole

Christa Innis: dramatic scene. Like, I’ve started kind of picturing these as like SNL skits sometimes. Like little sketches, you know?

And I’m like, oh my god, all the people in the pantry. Yeah. What if like the father in law comes

Suzanne Lambert: in? I’d be listening outside because I’m toxic. Like I would fully be like, I’d be like, Can I just get the hot dog buns? Like, I don’t, not trying to like cause a thing. You need everything in that pantry. You guys have all the food in there.

Like, we’re starving. There. Yes. Go in the garage.

Christa Innis: I’m so dramatic. I would do the same thing. I would probably be like, literally all the food’s in there. I’m starving. I will die if I don’t go into that pantry right now. And

Suzanne Lambert: I’d stay in and just like, like, watch what’s going on. You guys need a ref? Yes. I’m here.

Yeah.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. When I explained she made me uncomfortable, and that’s why I mentioned boundaries, she was appalled. She acted like I cussed her out, completely missing the point. The conversation dissolved. Devolved in her screaming while my fiance and I stood there stunned. Oh my gosh.

Suzanne Lambert: Ow.

Christa Innis: The next morning she returned to the cabin.

I knew I had to confront her because I felt so unsettled. I pulled her aside with my fiance present and said, the way you spoke to me was unfair, disrespectful, and beyond damaging. Um, you said, how dare you talk to your mother in law like that? And I say, Or maybe she said, and I say, how dare you speak to me that way?

How dare you

Suzanne Lambert: talk to your daughter in law like that?

Christa Innis: Right. You know? It’s like, it’s that older thing where they think like, you respect me no matter what. You owe them something. No. And it’s like,

Suzanne Lambert: no dude, that’s not how this is gonna go.

Christa Innis: Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: At all. That might have been how it was with my husband and you as his mom, but that’s not the kind of behavior that I tolerate, nor, nor should she.

Christa Innis: Yeah, yeah. It’s like, you didn’t raise me. I’m not your daughter.

Suzanne Lambert: God, therapy eludes these people, I swear. It’s like, just go to a therapist, lady. Like, you have some problems.

Christa Innis: Yeah. It’s always the people who need it. Yeah. People like that, like, never see that they’re the problem. Yeah, which seems

Suzanne Lambert: awesome. It seems like an awesome way to live.

Imagine never thinking you’re the problem and everyone else is. Mm hmm. Instead of, like, lying awake at night thinking about something I said to someone, like, over the weekend that was, like, harmless, but, you know, like, they’re, they’re just thinking everyone else is wrong and they’re right. Like, it seemed, I’m, I’m jealous.

I wish I didn’t have a conscience. It seems fantastic. It seems really easy, you know? Oh yeah, it must be really nice. Yeah. Teach us. Have her on next. Teach us how to have no conscience. You seem like you have a really easy life. Just not care about it.

Christa Innis: I will literally, like, look at someone the wrong way or say hi the wrong way and I’m like, Do they think I hate them?

Yeah. No, for

Suzanne Lambert: sure. Like, Or people will say things like, Oh, when I met you, I thought you were, you know, one way. And I’m like, oh crap. Like, is that the vibe I’m putting out? You know, like, I hate to think about, like, actually genuinely hurting people if, like, they’ve done nothing wrong, you know? Like, it’s Right.

It’s crazy.

Christa Innis: Yes. Uh, for two She says, For two years, I’ve dedicated my time and energy to your son and your family, and you have no right to treat me like this. I started crying as I spoke, and my fiancé stepped in to back me up. She tried to apologize and hug me. I’d be like, don’t touch me, but I was overwhelmed.

I could barely respond. Eventually she left saying, I’m happy. We talked,

I would be, I’d be more mad at

Suzanne Lambert: that. I think. Oh, that’s icky. Like, I’m not a therapist, thankfully. That would be bad, but like, that, it’s like, you wanna, she wanted to break her down until she was at her lowest possible point. So in a way, she, the mother in law, like, got what she wanted. Is that the end of

Christa Innis: the story?

Um, there’s one more little paragraph.

Suzanne Lambert: Okay. Hold on. Pause on that. Like, that That’s wild and honestly, it makes me also feel sad for her fiance like what he went through growing up? If that was the kind of dynamic it’s like, oh, you’re only cool with me if I’m like unhappy, you know, like

Christa Innis: That’s why it’s such a weird mentality to me because like, you know, we were talking about like, you know, she’s like a boy mom.

So like, wouldn’t you be excited? Like, oh, I have a future daughter in law like we can do like girly stuff or whatever.

Suzanne Lambert: Yes.

Christa Innis: And so like, why is there like a competition or like rivalry? I don’t understand if you have boys or girls. I have a girl.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah. Okay. So yeah, so you can’t even like relate to the boy mom mentality, but I’ve always said like, I want a daughter, and I, I can’t have a gender reveal, well one, I just wouldn’t for personal reasons, but like, I couldn’t because if it weren’t a girl, like I know I would be like so sad, cause I love, I want a daughter so bad, and I love boys too, like I’ll be happy with either, whatever.

Yeah. But like, Especially if you’ve always wanted a girl, which it sounds like the mom did given that she was so excited to go wedding dress shopping. Wouldn’t you be like, Oh my God, I have to make this girl be obsessed with me. Yeah. I have to make her love me. Like my mother in law is, and she has one girl, but she has two boys, but she’s such a girl’s girl.

And she’s always like doing sweet things and being thoughtful. And like, she was amazing during the wedding process. And this girl deserves that. And I hate that she’s, like, clouded what’s supposed to be happy times with her wild, untheorized behavior.

Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. Same here. Like, my mother in law has an amazing style.

Like, she has better style than me. And she’ll be like, here, this is what I got, like, It’s like another girlfriend. Like, she’s so awesome. Totally. I need to

Suzanne Lambert: text mine back, speaking of crap. Gabby, if you hear this, I’ll text you back. I’m sorry. Um, yeah. No, I, I completely agree. God, and if I was this girl’s mother, I don’t know if this is, like, things on the fiancé’s side, but if I heard another grown ass woman talking to my daughter this way, I’d be like, listen, mother in law versus mother in law, like, this is wild.

Yeah, like, what’s, what’s the goal here? And what’s, and like, I don’t know, she hasn’t, she actually weirdly, maybe not weirdly, she hasn’t mentioned her future father in law. So I don’t know if there is a future father in law, or if he’s just so used to the behavior that he’s just defeated and doesn’t say anything.

But I’m like, surely this woman has someone in her life. That’s

Christa Innis: when you’re going

Suzanne Lambert: to stop acting this way.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I wonder if she’s like a widower or something, and so she’s like, Oh, my sons are all I have. Right. You know, that would make it even more intensified. Yeah. Cause I feel like guilt on the sons, but you need to take care of me.

But dang, I wish we could ask her, like, give us

Suzanne Lambert: more. But, uh, yeah, I feel like maybe she would have mentioned that if she were, but that’s, um, wow. That’s it. What a, I mean, I feel like

Christa Innis: With also this kind of strong personality, I feel like also the other option is that, like you said, the father in law is just exhausted.

He’s like, I don’t even fight with her anymore. We’ve been married for 30 years. I just sit in the back, you know, my recliner, which stocks,

Suzanne Lambert: It’s like, you can’t just give up, you know, just because you’re used to it. Other people aren’t used to it. This better

Unfiltered Takes

Christa Innis: end well, or I’m gonna be upset. Alright, let’s see.

It’s been almost two months since this incident. I’ve made an appointment to go dress shopping with my mom, my fiancé’s aunt, Okay, so it was like the sister, I think. Okay. Oh, and his mom. All present on that original incident deck in a few weeks. Okay, so she wrote this before this dress shopping thing happened.

So there might be another thing. I texted them and while everyone else was enthusiastic, her response was noticeably less so. It has been a nightmare, but I hope this story entertained someone. It definitely did. And then she said, part two coming soon questions. Yes! So I’m gonna have to reach out to her. I want to come

Suzanne Lambert: back for part two.

Oh my god, we should do that. Um, I am inviting myself. Wait, I want her, I want her to beat her at her future mother in law’s own game and try on the most outrageous, like, showiest, skankiest dresses that exist. Even if that’s not her style. And be, like, dead ass serious. Like, essentially, like, try on lingerie.

And be like, yeah, I love this one. Cause you know this mother in law will hate that. I also do not support her going. Um, I think that’s a bad idea. I actually went solo quite a few times before I went with anyone else because I had no idea what I liked and what I wanted.

Christa Innis: Um,

Suzanne Lambert: and I, and I liked doing it that way, but, um, I hope her mother in law is not the type to like body shame.

I mean, it definitely sounds like she is. Yeah. Um, Oh, I don’t want her to be invited, but I hope if she does go that she has a little fun with it and she just tries on really ugly, crazy tacky dresses.

Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s like my thought is like, she’s like, okay, let’s just move forward now, but it just sounds like the mother in law never actually apologized.

And so I feel like she should lose privileges to like come to things then because yeah, you’d want to be comfortable like you’re trying on your wedding, future wedding dress possibly. So right.

Suzanne Lambert: And she needs a mean friend to go with her. I’ll go with her. She needs someone who will be like, If you say one more thing like that, Judy, you’re like, you’re out or like, honestly, she should even like Warren, the bridal stylist and the people who work at the salon, like my mother in law’s crazy, please intervene where necessary, but she needs someone who’s going to vouch.

Yeah. For her.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Because it can’t be an engagement party or whatever, the cookout was like part two where the mother in law is saying stuff to her and everyone’s just watching. And

Suzanne Lambert: phones need to be forbidden because her mother in law absolutely sounds like the type to take a picture of the dress and post it on Facebook.

Yes. Like she will. And I’ve heard of them doing that. I’ve heard of mothers doing that.

Christa Innis: Yes. I literally just saw a story, um, actually Cassie, who, who was on like a few weeks ago, she, um, shared a story about an aunt doing that. She was shopping for dresses. Yes. Posted a picture, didn’t see anything wrong with it, and like, fought hard, and they were like, you can’t do that.

Like, you’re not involved in any other wedding stuff now. She needs to take her

Suzanne Lambert: phone and just like, throw it in the street. Like, cause that, she will do that, and she will also definitely verbally describe it to people, I’m sure. Oh yeah. Which you may or may not, I mean, verbalizing it is one thing, seeing it’s another, but.

Oh, I don’t like

Christa Innis: that. Yeah, I’m gonna have to follow up with her and then we’ll, it would be kind of cool if she’d want to come on and chat. Yes! People are like, they don’t want to see their, like, Heather face, but if I can figure out a way to like, we’ll have her

Suzanne Lambert: camera off. One of those things in like, the mystery shows where their like, back is facing and they’re backlit.

It’s like a deep voice or something. It’s like SVU. So not SVU, but like criminal mind or whatever. Yeah, it’s so funny. Yeah, a voice garbler. Oh my god She does it does sound like my who could have been my future mother in law. So I I know this type of woman all too well And it does not get better, unfortunately, uh, Yeah.

You just learn how to deal with it. And for the long haul, I guess.

Christa Innis: Yeah. But you gotta

Suzanne Lambert: beat them at their own game. So I think she should just try on a lot of really ugly dresses. And then, and then guess what? If she doesn’t find her dress at this, which I honestly hope she doesn’t, She did the thing. She checked the box.

She brought her mother in law with her. She can just go with her mom and the people of her choosing.

Christa Innis: Yeah. To the

Suzanne Lambert: next appointment. I mean, I had like, I don’t know about you. I think I was on my seventh visit to a bridal salon before I finally found one. Like, I didn’t try it on and find it immediately.

So I’m hoping that’s the case for her.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I honestly wish, like, looking back that I spent more time. I think I was just, I’m like such a Box checker like and I like it. But I did a lot of research online first. So I knew the exact style of Nice, and then I had like one day where I just bought like I brought my maid of honor one bridesmaid. My mom and my mother in law are very short and sweet.

I think I tried on like six dresses and I found it Oh, that’s awesome. Oh, that’s amazing. Yeah, I

Suzanne Lambert: don’t like wasting time. I’m just like let’s do it But I, efficient efficiency. Yeah. Like I, I, I liked my dress by the, I didn’t, I wasn’t like, I love it, but I liked it enough. I liked it enough, if that makes sense.

Like, I didn’t think I was gonna have the teary moment, like I just, me personally, I just wouldn’t have that over a wedding dress. And I think it’s amazing that other people do, and I have it over other people’s. Mm-hmm . But everyone else was crying, including my cousin Liz, who doesn’t cry. unless she’s like laughing at something and I was like, okay, if Liz is crying, this is like straight up.

So I hope that she will. She needs to have a force field around her to, like, protect her joy, um, and not let her mother in law say anything. And honestly, if her mother in law starts critiquing her, be like, oh, is this what we’re doing? You go try on some dresses and I’ll critique you next. Yeah. Surprise, mother in law.

Yeah. We can

Christa Innis: both do this. Oh my gosh, I love that. Okay, well that was a crazy story. Um, The way I like to end these, um, episodes is our weekly confessions game. So a couple people send me their confessions on Instagram, and I know we’re kind of going a little over time, so. That’s okay. We can move quickly.

Yeah, sorry, I’m a, I’m a gabber. No, I love it. This has been so much fun. I’ve been loving it. Um, so these are people, Instagram. Um, and so, let’s react to them. Okay. First one says, my mom, oh gosh, my mom called my husband, my ex fiancé’s name, on our wedding day.

Suzanne Lambert: Oh no! Did the husband hear? Like he knew it happened?

Um, I assume he must have. I’m trying to think of anything in my head. I’m like, maybe he didn’t know. Oh yikes.

Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s, that’s rough, especially on the wedding day.

Suzanne Lambert: And things just happen like that, and it doesn’t mean anything, you know? I actually, if it makes her feel any better, not gonna say who, a close friend on her wedding day referred to her now husband as her ex husband’s name.

Christa Innis: Oh no. And she

Suzanne Lambert: was like, oh my god, don’t tell ex I said that. And I was like, no, of course, but like, it doesn’t, it doesn’t mean anything. Like, it just happens sometimes.

Christa Innis: Yeah,

Suzanne Lambert: you’re like in the moment,

Christa Innis: and

Suzanne Lambert: it’s not like a friend saying,

Christa Innis: yeah, it’s not like Ross saying Rachel’s name at the end of the aisle.

Suzanne Lambert: That would be a very different thing,

Christa Innis: yes.

Suzanne Lambert: Yeah. Sometimes it just happens. And also, like, our parents can never remember anyone’s name. My dad has known all of my friends for, like, over a decade, and he has no idea who anyone is. Don’t put too much stock into it. I don’t know. I’m trying to rationalize it.

Christa Innis: And it’s, like, the ongoing joke with me and my friends, too, where, like, our dads have known all of us, like, for so long, and it’s, like, just, like, a dad thing, I feel. And he’ll

Suzanne Lambert: be, like, no, I’ve never met that person. He’ll look at me, like, I’m crazy. He’s, like, I’ve never met them. I’m, like, dad. Like, you’ve, they’ve actually told you, like, secrets.

And like confided in you. You’ve given them advice that they still talk about. You most certainly know them. He’s just really playing good at the game of like, Oh, I kept that secret really well. Minding his business. Yeah, right. He’s like, well, I don’t, I don’t know anything about that. I’m a

Christa Innis: Scorpio. I keep secrets.

Oh my gosh. Okay. This next one says, my brother’s ex forced her way into my wedding party and now she’s in all of the photos. Her brother’s ex? My brother’s ex-fiance. Oh, yeah, my brother’s ex.

Suzanne Lambert: Oh, well That’s why you gotta put them at the end of the picture, so you can crop them out very easily if needed.

Christa Innis: Well, and I have a lot of questions, like, how does someone get, how does someone force their way into a wedding? That’s not a

Suzanne Lambert: thing. That’s when you say no.

Christa Innis: It’s like, it’s like that person that just automatically is like, can’t wait for the bachelorette party, like this mother in law. But it’s like, oh, when am I coming to the bachelorette party?

What dresses are we getting? And then you’re afraid to say no. Right. Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: Like, I didn’t have my sister’s in law in my wedding party because I’m closer with people than I am with them, but they also didn’t think anything of it, right? Like, just because we’re related doesn’t mean you have to be included, um, so, yeah, there’s, there’s no such thing as forcing her way in.

Unfortunately, you did kind of. Let her do that. Yeah, I know it’s hard, but that’s awkward. Yeah when they’re in the photo Then you’re just like well get someone on. Hey, there’s someone on reddit who can photoshop them out. Like I Just go go find a good photoshopper

Christa Innis: Yeah, definitely Um, okay This last one says I cut off my sister for trash talking about myself and my husband to one of my children . Good.

Yeah. Yeah. That’s a bold move on the, um, sister for talking trash to your child. That’s weird. And I love

Suzanne Lambert: that the kid told you. Loyal. I’d be like, yes, you’re my kind of kid. Yes. Keep that up. And I wonder what, I wonder what she said. I know. That, and kids repeat everything they hear. Yeah. Really think they’re not gonna tell her that you were talking about her?

Like, they repeat everything. Even when we don’t think they’re listening. Right. And it’d be weird to

Christa Innis: Be like, don’t tell your mom this. Like, well, right. That, I, yeah. That would be Like, that’s a whole new

Suzanne Lambert: level of, like, creepy and weird. Like, we don’t do that. That’s a, yeah. That’s like a new definition of red flag.

Like, if 100%. Yeah. Oh, good. I’m, I’m happy she cut her off. That’s Good for you. That’s awesome. Wild. Yeah, I’m feeling really fortunate for the family. I have right now, to be honest, like yeah, it could be worse. It could be worse.

Christa Innis: I just say like people like there’s some people when I first started saying like different stories, they were like, Oh, you’re spreading toxicity and I’m like, but then I would get messages and they’re like, no, you’ve allowed me to like have boundaries or you allow me to see like great relationships.

I do have. And I was like, Honestly, like, it does the same thing. Like, I’m like, It makes you really look at your, like, relationships you do have and you’re like, Okay, I have good people in my life. Or, like, here’s how to communicate when something’s not right. Or, like, It makes you see what not to do.

Suzanne Lambert: It’s not promoting toxicity.

Like, also, like, toxic positivity is very much a thing. Trust me, when I started doing stand up comedy, I would make silly, harmless jokes about wedding culture. People were mad, like, people get very sensitive around the wedding topic, and I’m like, dude, you have to be able to laugh at yourself, and also, what you’re doing helps other people see, oh, my mother in law does that.

And I, I thought maybe I was alone in feeling like it was not okay, but now I’m being validated. It’s not. Right. And also, they did the toxic thing, we’re just talking about it. Exactly. Right? We’re not toxic. We’re perfect. That’s been established throughout the entire podcast. 100%. Um, no, that’s, yeah, I feel very fortunate, honestly.

I’m gonna go call my mother in law and be like, just wanted to say, for not cornering me in pantries recently. We gotta find out more about this pantry. Yeah, I do. Would love to see a floor plan. Um, it sounds like a gorgeous house. Uh, I would like to hear more about the house. Maybe we’ll get an invite next year.

I would love to go. Live show in this pantry. Where we have a microphone up to the, up to the pantry. And actually, if anyone has any kind of beef they need to air out, that’s where they have to go. It’s like a dedication.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. It’s like the real world. Like we’re like, they would have cameras everywhere.

Like the confessional was in the pantry. Yes. It’ll be the confessional.

Suzanne Lambert: Wow. Soon.

Christa Innis: We have a

Suzanne Lambert: TV, so yeah, I think, no, is it, no, I know one of them is like, um, in the political world now. So that’s, that’s love that one of the reality TV, real world alum. So, you know, I’ll be looking that up. Yeah. Reality stars are just everywhere these days.

They,

Christa Innis: Yeah, reality stars. They’re just like us

Suzanne Lambert: So much.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Um, well, thank you so much for coming on. I had so much fun, like hanging out with you. I love your takes and this was just so much fun hanging out. Um, can you tell everyone where they can find you, what you’re currently working on and all that good stuff?

Absolutely.

Suzanne Lambert: You can find me on all socials, so TikTok, Instagram, at, it’s Suzanne Lambert, S U Z A N N E. People think Susan and Suzanne are the same name, they’re not. Um, and I’m, you’ll see me every day posting videos, I talk about politics, I talk about makeup, skincare, just, whatever, spur of the moment. Um, and I, I co op, or I collaborate with some news outlets, so sometimes you’ll see that, see that too.

And I have a podcast launching soon, so more about that. So that will definitely Uh, be hitting you up once that’s live, but, uh, just keep a lookout.

Christa Innis: Awesome. Very exciting. Well, awesome. Well, thank you so much for coming on. It was so much fun and like officially meeting you and I love your content. Yeah.

Suzanne Lambert: Thank you.

I love yours. Thank you.